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sugarplum217 · 12 hours ago

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Essence Of Loyalty (Pt.1)

Pairing: Terry Richmond X Black Plus Size Female Reader

Warnings: MDNI (18+) contains sexual explicit content, heavy smut, spit play, oral sex, A VERY HEAVY USE OF “daddy” and “mama”, unprotected sex, cursing, major dirty talk, creampie, mentions of murder, lots of heavy sexual flirtation, detailed sexual acts , fluff

AuthorsNote: Please excuse any mistakes or grammatical errors. I hope you enjoy the story and remember to be kind and if you want to be tagged in the next part let me know.

Summary: Everyone and their mama has been trying to either set you up on a date with someone or continuously remind you that your clock is ticking away. That you weren’t getting any younger and your looks would eventually fade. What they didn’t know is that you already had your special someone. In fact you’ve had him a while. You know how that saying goes, “Good things come to those who wait” and for you in this instance. It was nothing but the waiting game for your special someone to finally walk into your life. The question is .. would it be acceptable for everyone else?

You never expected to fall in love with a man behind bars. It started as nothing more than a random click—some late-night curiosity fueled by boredom and an ad that popped up between Facebook posts. Find love where you least expect it. Meet single men looking for companionship. You damn near scrolled past it, but something made you stop. Maybe it was the way the words “love” and “companionship” stood out, teasing something you didn’t realize you were craving. Maybe it was just the boredom, the same mundane routine of work, home, sleep, repeat, stretching on like a treadmill you couldn’t step off. Either way, you clicked. Scrolling through the profiles felt like flipping through a catalog you had no business browsing. Men of all ages and backgrounds, some looking for friendship, others for love. But none of them caught your attention. That is—until you saw him. Inmate 07541, Terrance Richmond. Baby, that mugshot stopped you cold. Rich buttery light caramel skin, sharp jawline, and full lips that looked like they could whisper secrets straight into your soul. His nose was strong, his features chiseled, but it was those damn piercing uniquely colored eyes that did it. Deep-set, hooded, with a stare so intense you could feel it through the screen. Something about them made your heart stutter—like he was looking at you, past you, into you. There was no forced smile, no tough-guy posturing. Just that stare. You hesitated, hovering over the message button. What the hell were you doing? Messaging a man serving time? A man who, according to his bio, had been locked up since he was 18? Still, curiosity won. You typed out a casual introduction—something light, something safe—and hit send. Then you pushed it to the back of your mind, fully expecting no response, but he wrote back. And not just some half-assed, one-line reply. He wrote you back.

That first message turned into another. And another. Emails became long letters, paragraphs bleeding into pages, until you found yourself rushing home from work just to see his name in your inbox. You learned everything about him—the way he used to play football before his life changed, the music he listened to, the books he read to escape the four walls of his cell. He told you about his past, the pain, the betrayal, the night everything changed. And you told him about yours—how life felt like it was happening at you instead of for you. How you wanted more, but you didn’t know what more even looked like. Then came the sweet video calls. The first time you saw him move, saw that sharp jaw flex when he smiled, heard that deep, velvety voice rumble straight through the screen—you were done. Hooked. Gone. Two years later, here you were. In a relationship—a real one, even if nobody knew. And in a few days, he’d be free. And that? That scared you more than anything.

“You always got an excuse, girl. What is tea?”Sonya’s voice snapped you back to the present, and you blinked, realizing your fork had been hovering over your plate for way too long. It was lunchtime at Taste Of The South Cafe, your usual Friday spot with the girls. The table was cluttered with half-empty margarita glasses, plates of fried catfish and mac and cheese, and the scent of honey butter croissants floating in the air. Normally, this was your escape from the monotony of work. But today? You were ready to go.

“I just wanna relax,” You half way lied, pushing your food around. Sonya wasn’t buying it. Neither was Deja.

“Girl, please,” Deja scoffed. “Every time we plan a girls’ night, your ass come up with something. What’s up? You sneakin’ around with somebody?”

“Ain’t nobody sneakin’.” You forced a laugh, shaking your head.

“Then why you always rushin’ home like you got a man waitin’ on you?” Sonya arched a brow, swirling her margarita.

“Because I do.” You thought to yourself. But you didn’t say that. Instead, you shrugged, hoping they’d let it go. They didn’t.

“You sure it ain’t that new dude in accounting?” Deja pressed. “The one with the Audi and the beard? Girl, he is fine.”

“Not my type,” You said quickly.

Sonya snorted. “And what is your type? Because last time I checked, you were single as hell.”

You just smiled, keeping your real thoughts locked up tight. Because your type wasn’t something you could explain to them. Your type wasn’t sitting in an office, making six figures, and posting gym selfies on Instagram. Your type was locked behind bars. A man who had spent more of his life inside than out. A man whose voice alone made your thighs clench, whose absence felt like a missing limb. But they wouldn’t get that. So you just laughed it off, switched the subject, and counted down the hours until you could talk to him. The day dragged. By the time you made it to your car, your feet were aching, your patience was shot, and you were tired. But none of that mattered. Because in just a few minutes, he’d be calling. The drive home was full of bumper-to-bumper traffic and the usual call from your mama.

“Hey ma” You greeted, honking the car in front of you to move their ass.

“Hey my baby. You comin’ to dinner this weekend?” She asked.

“Yeah, I’ll be there.” You make a face, thanking god she can’t see you.

“Good. Your sister’s bringing her fiancé.” She said, her tone laced with excitement. Of course, she was. Your older sister had the picture-perfect life—a man, a ring, a timeline that fit neatly into the family’s expectations.

“And he’s bringing his brother,” You mother added casually.

You sighed. “Ma—”

“Just be open-minded! You’re a beautiful girl, and you ain’t gettin’ any younger.” She reminded for the hundredth time. You gritted your teeth, gripping the steering wheel. If only she knew. But you decided to let it go.

“I’ll see you Saturday.” You shook your head, hanging up.By the time you got home, it was 6:59pm. You barely had time to drop your purse before your phone lit up with that Incoming Call from your ‘Big Daddy’. You squealed, feeling your heart flip.

You snatched it up, answering with a smile. “Hey, baby.”

“Damn, I needed to hear your voice.” A low chuckle rumbled through the speaker, deep enough to send heat pooling between your thighs.

You melted instantly. “Long day?”

“Long as hell,” He sighed. “But I knew I’d be hearin’ from you, so I got through it.”

Your chest tightened. “I missed you.”

“Yeah? I missed you more baby” He smirked. You could hear it in his voice. “Tell me about your day, baby.”

So you did. You told him everything—lunch with your nosy-ass friends, your mama trying to set you up. And he listened quietly like always when it came to your day and what crazy ass story you had ready for him. That was one of the many things you loved about Terry, how he could just listen and never get tired of you talking.

“Don’t sweat that shit, baby. You got a man.” He chuckled, low and smooth. That possessiveness made your toes curl.

“Yeah?” you teased. “I got a man?”

“Hell yeah,” He murmured. “And in a few days, you gon’ have me in every way possible.”

Your breath hitched and your body got hot. Because in just a few days, Terry Richmond would be free. And you would finally be his. You adjusted the phone against your ear, stretching out on the couch, letting his voice roll over you like thick honey.

“You talkin’ real reckless, Mr. Terrance,” you teased, biting your lip. “What makes you think you gettin’ all this good good so easy?”

A deep, knowing chuckle rumbled through the receiver, sending shivers down your spine. “Baby,” He drawled, voice rich and slow like he was savoring every syllable. “Don’t play wit’ me. You and I both know the second I touch down, I’ma have you laid out for me, just how I like it.”

“Oh yeah?” Your thighs pressed together at the promise in his tone.

“Hell yeah. First thing I’m doin’ is spreadin’ them thighs, makin’ up for lost time. You know I been starvin’ for you. Ain’t had a taste of sweet pussy in years. I need my plate, ma.” He stated, making your breath hitch and heat coil in your lower belly.

“Terry…” You breathed, squeezing your eyes shut.

“Say my name just like that when I’m between them legs,” He murmured. “Matter fact, scream it. I’ma put my mouth on every inch of you. Them thighs? Mine. Them hips? Mine. That spot you say makes you weak right under your belly button? I’m kissin’ it first. And you already know where I’m endin’ up.”

Your body responded to his words instantly, your nipples tightening against the fabric of your blouse. The ache between your thighs grew unbearable. You were so tempted to rub on your clit as he talked to you, but you knew big daddy’s rules. You weren’t allowed to touch yourself at all unless he gave the permission and could listen to you without any interruptions.

“You talkin’ crazy,” You whispered, your voice thick with need.

“Nah, baby, I’m talkin’ facts. You gon’ see. Soon as I get out, you ain’t leavin’ that bed for at least three days.” He chuckled.

“Oh, so I’m just gonna be held hostage?” You let out a shaky laugh, your fingers toying with the hem of your skirt.

“Damn right,” He said without hesitation. “Ain’t no way I been locked up this long just to finally get my hands on you and let you go. Shit, you gon’ be beggin’ me to let you breathe.”

Your stomach flipped. You wanted that. Needed that. But then, reality settled back in. The system didn’t make things easy.

“Speaking of that…What did your lawyer say about your release date? Will you be out on my birthday like we want?” You exhaled, shifting the phone closer to your ear. It was silence for a moment. The weight of it pressed heavy between you, thick and uncertain. You held your breath preparing for the worst case scenario possible.

“They still pushin’ for my original release date, but you know how this shit go. Paperwork, red tape, all that. My lawyer confident, though. He say if everything lines up, I should be out right on time. Maybe even a couple days before.” Terry let out a slow breath.

“For real?” Your chest tightened with cautious hope.

“For real, baby. But…” He hesitated. “You know they been tryin’ to trip me up in here. COs, some of these jealous-ass inmates. They know I’m close to freedom, and they hate that shit. I gotta keep my head low, stay out the way, but it’s hard sometimes. Real hard.”

“They still on that bullshit?” Your jaw clenched.

“Yeah,” He muttered. “They hate a nigga like me gettin’ a second chance. And these lame ass inmates tryna set me up don’t help either.”

“Terry, I swear to God if they—”You closed your eyes, frustration bubbling inside you.

“Relax, mama,” He said, voice dropping into that deep, soothing register that always made you weak. “Ain’t nothin’ stoppin’ me from comin’ home to you. I promise you that. I done made it through too much to let these motherfuckers take my freedom again.”

“Baby, please promise me you won’t do nothin’ to mess this up. I need you here. I need you home.” You frowned, Terry remained silent allowing you to vent because he knew this was becoming harder everyday for you to cope with. You swallowed hard, throat tight.

“I just…” You hesitated, then admitted softly, “I just need you here. I don’t want anything messin’ this up. My 28th birthday… Terry, all I want is you.”

“I know, ma. Trust me, I know.” His voice softened, turning serious. “You the only thing keepin’ me sane in here. The only thing keepin’ me goin’. I promise you, I ain’t lettin’ nothin’ get in the way of me comin’ home to you.”

“Okay,” you whispered. “I trust you.” You inhaled deeply, letting his words settle over you.

“You got me for life baby,” He said assuring you, voice thick with emotion. “I swear to you, baby. If I gotta fight every damn day until that judge signs my release, I’ma do it. ‘Cause you worth it. We worth it.”

“You better mean that,” You whispered. Tears pricked your eyes, but you blinked them away.

“I do. And when I’m finally out, when I got you in my arms, I’ma make sure you never question that again.”

“I love you so much.” You exhaled shakily.

“I love you more, baby.” He bit his lip, feeling his heart speed up.

“You swear you gonna come home to me, Terry?” You exhaled, stretching your legs out on the couch, your free hand absently trailing over your bare thigh.

“Baby, listen to me.” His voice came through the receiver, deep and unwavering. “I need you to hear me when I say this. Ain’t nothin’ stoppin’ me from comin’ home to you. I done wasted enough years locked up, dreamin’ about what it feel like to be free, to wake up next to a woman who actually give a damn about me. I ain’t lettin’ no CO, no hating-ass inmate, no system take that from me.”

You closed your eyes, soaking in his words. A small tear escaped your eyes as you just let him talk and calm all of your fears.

“And you really think I’m about to let you be out here spendin’ another birthday without me? Nah, ma. That ain’t happenin’.” He let out a low chuckle, the sound vibrating through your chest. “Matter fact, you should start gettin’ ready now, ‘cause soon as I step through that door, I’m givin’ you somethin’ to celebrate.”

“Oh yeah? What you givin’ me, Terry?” A slow smile spread across your lips.

“Ain’t it obvious? My last name, first of all.” He stated matter of factly.

“Boy, stop playin’.” Your breath caught in your throat.

“Who playin’?” He challenged. “You really think I been doin’ all this talkin’, dreamin’ about you, makin’ plans, just to be out here on some casual shit? Nah, baby. You my woman. And when I get home, I’m puttin’ a ring on that pretty lil’ finger. You ain’t gon’ be nobody else’s but mine.”

Heat spread through your chest, settling deep in your belly. He always had a way of making you feel claimed, but this? This was different. This felt all too real and that he was promising you the moon and the stars and would actually reach up in the damn sky and get it for you.

“Terry…” You purred slightly.

“Say it again,” He murmured, voice dropping to that low, dangerous octave that always did something to you. “Say my name just like that.”

“Terry.” Your lips parted, slowing your words down for him.

“Mmm,” He groaned. “That’s what I wanna hear every morning, every night. That’s what I wanna hear when I’m makin’ love to you, when I’m in it so deep you forget how to say anything else.”

“You tryna kill me, huh?” You sucked in a breath, your thighs pressing together instinctively.

“Nah, ma. Just tryna remind you who you belong to.” He smirked, licking his lips.

You chewed your lip, heart pounding against your ribs. The thought of him finally being here, of feeling him, touching him, owning him in the flesh—it was almost too much.

“Terry…” You started, voice soft, hesitant.

“What’s wrong, baby?” He adjusted the phone on his ear, eyebrows furrowing. You hesitated a moment afraid to tell him what’s really been on your mind. Afraid he wouldn’t understand but truth was Terry was more than understanding when it came to you.

“I just… I keep thinking about what’s gonna happen once you’re really here. Like, when it’s not just phone calls and emails. When it’s real. When it’s us.” You honestly confessed, sighing. You heard a brief pause making your stomach tighten out of angst. You held your breath afraid he’d be upset but after a few seconds, he then spoke gently.

”That’s what you scared of?” He asked, voice soft.

You swallowed. “Not scared, just… it’s gonna be different. You been inside since you were 18, Terry. That’s—” You did the math in your head, stomach twisting. “Seventeen years. That’s a long time.”

“I know,” He said simply. “You think I don’t know that? Every damn day, I been countin’ down to this moment. I know it’s gon’ be an adjustment. I ain’t naive to that, baby. But what I do know is that I want this. You. I ain’t spent two years fallin’ in love with you for nothin’. And I damn sure ain’t finna let somethin’ as small as a transition period shake me.”

You exhaled, nodding even though he couldn’t see you. “I just want you to be happy, Terry.”

“I am happy, ma. You make me happy.” He professed from his heart, making your heart squeeze and stomach flutter.

“Now,” He continued, voice laced with that familiar hunger. “Can we get back to what I was sayin’? ‘Cause I still got a whole list of things I plan to do to you soon as I get out.”

“Oh yeah? Go ‘head then, baby. I’m listenin’.” Your stomach flipped.

Terry exhaled through the receiver, the sound slow and deliberate. “Aight, so… First thing I’m doin’ soon as I step through that door? I’m droppin’ my bag, pullin’ you close, and kissin’ you like I been starvin’ for it.”

“Mmmm.” You bit your lip, already picturing the scene.

“Ain’t gon’ be no soft, sweet shit neither. Nah,” He rumbled. “I’m talkin’ about deep, wet, tongue all in your mouth, my hands locked around that waist, pullin’ you so tight you feel my dick pressin’ up against you.”

“Damn, Big Daddy. Can I at least take my heels off first?” You let out a breathy laugh.

“Hell nah,” He said smoothly. “Matter fact, leave ‘em on. I want you just like that. Fresh off work, tight lil’ skirt ridin’ up, them pretty ass legs wrapped ‘round my waist while I pin you up against the door.”

“Oh shit..” Your entire body heated at the image. You had to fan yourself, and cross your legs to avoid any wetness seeping out.

“You know how long I been dreamin’ about that, baby?” His voice dropped an octave, turning into something dark, possessive. “Seventeen years. Seventeen years I been locked in this hellhole, surrounded by nothin’ but concrete and steel, knowin’ I ain’t got a real woman to touch, to taste, to claim. And then you came along…”

“B-Baby..” A soft gasp slipped from your lips. You squeezed your thighs shut tighter, already soaking your panties.

“And now all I can think about is how you gon’ feel underneath me. How soft your skin is. How good you smell. How sweet you taste.” He growled lowly in your ear.

“Shit.” You cursed, shifting on the couch, thighs pressing together.

“Mmm,” He hummed knowingly. “You wet for me, ain’t you?”

“Terry—” You swallowed.

“Nah, don’t try to play it off now,” He interrupted. “I know you, ma. I know you sittin’ there, grippin’ that phone tight, breathin’ all heavy, body heatin’ up just listenin’ to me talk. I don’t even need to be there to know how bad you want me.”

“You lucky you locked up.” You let out a shaky breath, tilting your head back against the couch.

“Lucky? Nah, baby. Unlucky. ‘Cause if I was home right now, I’d have you laid out, ass up, back arched, moanin’ my name so loud the neighbors call the cops.”He chuckled, voice dripping with amusement.

“Boy, stop!” You laughed, shaking your head. “You talk all that shit, I hope you got the stamina to back it up.”

Terry clicked his tongue. “Oh, you doubtin’ me? That’s crazy. Lemme find out my baby think I ain’t gon’ put in work.”

“I mean, it has been a long time, Big Papa,” You teased.

“Aight,” He drawled, tone dangerous. “Keep playin’ with me. You gon’ be beggin’ me to let you breathe when I’m done with you.”

Your stomach flipped at the way he said it, so smooth and confident like he had zero doubt in his ability to back up every single word. The next few hours passed in a blur, the two of you tangled in conversation like it was your own little world. Terry told you about the meals he was craving—real food, not that processed mess they served on metal trays. He wanted collard greens, mac and cheese, cornbread, fried chicken, all made by you. “I need a home-cooked meal, baby. Something made with love,” He said, his voice full of longing. You laughed and promised to have a whole spread waiting for him. Then the conversation shifted to the small things—how he couldn’t wait to sleep in a real bed, how he wanted to go outside at night just to feel the wind on his face without fences in the way, how he wanted to sit on the couch with you and watch a movie with your legs draped over his lap. “Shit like that, ma,” He murmured. “The simple stuff. That’s what I miss the most.”

And you listened, hanging onto his every word, feeling your heart swell with each confession. The world had taken so much from him, stripped him of so many years, but somehow, he still had softness in him. He still had love to give. You found yourself telling him about all the things you wanted to do together, too—how you wanted to take him out to eat at a real restaurant, go on a drive late at night just because, lay up with him on a Sunday morning while the smell of breakfast filled the apartment. The more you talked, the more the reality of him coming home settled deep inside you. “You really gon’ take care of me, huh?” he asked, his voice low and full of something tender. “You damn right,” you whispered. “Somebody gotta make up for all that time you lost.”

If someone had told you years ago that you’d fall in love with a man behind bars, you would’ve laughed in their face. You always wanted love, prayed for it even, but you never imagined it would come in the form of Terry Richmond—a man with a past heavier than most, a man who had seen the worst parts of life and still found a way to hold onto his soul. He was the most fascinating, most alluring man you’d ever known, and you had never been more open with anyone in your life. You craved him in ways that scared you sometimes. You wanted to be the one to feed him, to run him a hot bath and wash years of struggle off his skin. You wanted to rub his shoulders, his chest, his back, to remind him that he was human, that he was home. And the way he talked to you, the way he poured into you, made you feel like you were already his sanctuary.

After you finally got off the phone, you moved into your nighttime routine, taking your time washing your face, patting your skin dry, smoothing your serums in like a ritual. You stared at yourself in the mirror, thinking about how your life was about to change. In just a few days, he’d be here, in your space, in your bed, in your life outside of those prison walls. As you reached for your bonnet and wrapped it securely around your head, your phone buzzed on the counter. FaceTime. Mama. You sighed, knowing she’d scold you if you didn’t answer, so you slid your thumb across the screen and propped the phone up.

“Hey, Mama,” You greeted, already bracing yourself.

“Hey, baby,” She said, peering at you through the screen. “Just callin’ to say goodnight and check on you before you went to bed.”

“I’m alright , Mama. Just gettin’ ready for bed. Doing my usual routine.” You smiled.

“Mm-hmm,” She hummed, then her face lit up. “Oh! Guess who I ran into today? You remember Kiana Perkins from high school?”

You frowned, digging through your memory. “Kiana Perkins… oh yeah, the one who used to run track?”

“Yes, her! Baby, she married now, got two babies, livin’ all happy with her husband. She showed me pictures and everything. And I just… I don’t know, baby, it got me thinkin’.” She started in on you.

“Mama—” You groaned internally.

She held up a hand. “I know what you ‘bout to say, but hear me out. You not gettin’ any younger, baby. I just want you to have somebody. You always been my dumplin’, my soft-hearted baby, and I just—” She sighed. “I just want you to be loved, baby. I want somebody to take care of you for once.”

You bit your lip, heart squeezing at her words, but she didn’t know. She didn’t know that you did have somebody. That you had Terry. That soon, you wouldn’t be coming home to an empty bed anymore. You leaned back against the bathroom counter, swallowing the lump in your throat as your mother continued, her voice full of concern.

“You know, I just don’t want you to end up like me, raising a family all on your own. You’ve got so much to offer, baby, don’t let it go to waste.” She paused, waiting for you to respond, but you were caught in a whirlwind of emotions. You wanted to tell her the truth, but you couldn’t—not yet. Terry was still behind those walls, and the world wasn’t ready for your truth. Not yet.

“I hear you, Mama,” You said softly, forcing a smile that didn’t quite reach your eyes. “But I’m good. I’m happy with how things are right now.”

She eyed you, her brow furrowing, but she didn’t push it. “Alright,” she finally said, her tone softening. “Just don’t wait too long, baby. Time don’t wait for nobody.”

“I won’t, Mama. Promise,” You replied, though you knew the promise wasn’t to her. It was to yourself. You weren’t going to waste any more time. The conversation moved on, and you couldn’t help but feel a little guilty for not telling her about Terry. She didn’t know that every night, you fell asleep with thoughts of him, that his voice had become the lullaby you never knew you needed. You thought about his touch, his words, the way he made you feel like you were the only woman in the world. But for now, it was a secret. Your secret. You wrapped up the call with your mother, promising to be at Sunday dinner over the weekend, and hung up. The air felt thick now, like the weight of your own desires had settled in your chest. You finished getting ready for bed, your mind racing with thoughts of Terry, wondering if he was thinking about you too, wondering how much longer you’d have to wait before he was finally home. As you slipped under the

covers, your mind drifted to your happy place and that was Terry. Eventually after saying a quick silent prayer for him and his safety like you did every night, you finally went to sleep.

The morning light seeped through the blinds, casting long golden streaks across your bedroom. You lay there for a moment, tangled in your silk sheets, staring at the ceiling with a heavy mind. The anticipation sat on your chest like a weight. Today could be the day you got answers—real answers—about Terry’s release. No more guesswork, no more waiting in limbo. Either he’d be home in time for your birthday, or he wouldn’t. And if it was up to you, there wouldn’t be a wouldn’t. Your phone vibrated on the nightstand, shaking you from your thoughts. The number was unfamiliar, but you knew who it had to be before you even swiped to answer.

“Hello?” Your voice was groggy, thick with sleep, but there was an urgency beneath it.

“Good morning, this is Michael Walker, Terry Richmond’s attorney.” The voice on the other end was smooth, professional, but you caught that slight edge—like he was bracing himself for a conversation you might not want to have. “I wanted to give you an update on his case. Do you have a moment?”

“Of course. What’s the update?” You pushed yourself upright, resting your back against the headboard.

Michael exhaled. “So here’s where we are. We’re still waiting on the judge’s final decision regarding his release. As you know, we’ve been pushing hard for full release instead of parole, but the system moves at its own pace. Right now, it’s looking like one of two things will happen—either the judge will sign off on his release, and he’ll be free to come home, or he’ll be granted parole with conditions.”

Your stomach twisted at the word “conditions.” That could mean anything. A curfew. Mandatory check-ins. Restrictions on where he could go, what he could do. You wanted Terry free—not still tangled in the system’s web.

“Is there a chance he’ll be home by my birthday?” You asked, your voice smaller than you intended.

Michael hesitated. That damn hesitation. You hated it. “That’s what we’re aiming for,” He said finally. “But it’s all in the judge’s hands. We’re doing everything we can to make it happen, but we need to be realistic.”

Your fingers tightened around the phone. “I just… I need him home.” The words left you before you could stop them, more vulnerable than you wanted to sound.

“I get it,” Michael said, and for the first time, there was something softer in his tone. “But here’s the thing—you need to make sure Terry understands how important it is for him to stay in line right now. He’s close. So damn close. But if he gets into it with the COs, if he so much as breathes wrong in there, it could delay everything. Or worse.”

A lump formed in your throat. Terry had been through hell in that prison. You knew how hard it was for him to bite his tongue, to play the game when the guards disrespected him just for breathing. You also knew how much some of those inmates hated to see another Black man about to touch freedom. Envy was a dangerous thing.

“I’ll talk to him,” You said firmly. “I’ll make sure he knows.”

“Good,” Michael replied. “I’ll keep you posted on any updates. Until then, just keep him focused on what’s waiting for him on the outside.”

And that’s exactly what you planned to do. Because he was coming home. To you. To the life y’all had spent two years dreaming up. And you weren’t about to let anything or anyone take that away. The weight of everything that needed to be done before Terry came home sat on your shoulders like a mix of excitement and pressure. There was so much to prepare, so much to buy, so much to perfect before your man walked through that door and took his rightful place in your life. Clothes, toiletries, shoes, cologne—he was stepping into a world he hadn’t been a part of since he was barely legal, and you were determined to make sure he had everything he needed to start fresh. And then there was you. Your own upkeep was just as important. You wanted to look good good for him. A fresh Brazilian wax so your skin was baby smooth, eyebrows snatched, lashes full and fluttery, and your hair? Oh, that had to be flawless—not just for your birthday but because you already knew he was going to have it all over the place by the end of the night. You could already hear the headboard knocking, already feel his breath on your skin, already picture the way he’d grip you like he was making up for lost time. The thought alone made your stomach tighten with anticipation.

But beyond all the surface-level preparation, there was a deeper feeling swirling inside you. Letting a man you’d only seen through a screen and heard through a receiver move into your home was a huge step. Some would call it crazy. Hell, a part of you knew it was risky, but love had never been about playing it safe. And with Terry? It had never felt like a risk. It felt right. He was your soulmate—plain and simple. The man you wanted to

wake up to, fall asleep with, build a family with. You’d spent two years loving him from a distance, and now, you were stepping into a reality where he was yours in every way. You weren’t naive to the adjustments that would come with it, but you also weren’t afraid. He was worth it.

With a stretch and a soft sigh, you finally pulled yourself out of bed, the silk of your nightgown clinging to your curves as you padded across your bedroom. It barely covered your ass, the hem rising with each step, and you lazily reached for your robe, wrapping it around you before making your way into the kitchen. The house was still, quiet, but soon, it would be filled with his presence. Him walking around shirtless, his deep voice filling up every room, his scent lingering on the furniture. You couldn’t wait. As you reached for the fridge, your eyes landed on the Polaroid photo of him taped to the door—one of the few glimpses of him outside of a call or a video chat. He had sent it during one of the rare inmate photo days, his expression serious but his eyes still burning with something that made your stomach flip. Damn, you fine. You ran a finger over the image, smiling to yourself before pulling out the eggs and milk.

The one thing people probably wouldn’t understand was why you had never visited him in prison. It wasn’t that you didn’t want to. God knew you had begged to. But Terry? Terry was territorial to his core. It had taken months of back-and-forth, of pleading and arguing, before you finally accepted that he wasn’t going to let you step foot in that visiting room. He didn’t want no prison guards or inmates looking at his woman—studying you, lusting after you, imagining things about you that only he was allowed to. You belonged to him, and the thought of other men—especially those locked up with him—laying their eyes on you sent him into a rage he didn’t even try to hide. It wasn’t just possessiveness; it was protection. He had seen too many things go left in that place, and the last thing he wanted was for you to be a part of any of it. So, you let it go, trusting that the day would come when you wouldn’t have to love him from a distance. That day was almost here.

You were in the middle of whisking the batter for your waffles when your phone vibrated on the counter. Without hesitation, you snatched it up, already knowing who it was.

“Good morning, beautiful,” Terry’s deep, raspy voice sent a warmth down your spine. His morning voice was dangerous.

“Mmm, good morning, baby,” You hummed, tucking the phone between your ear and shoulder as you continued mixing. “How’d you sleep?”

“Would’ve slept better with you underneath me,” He murmured, the smirk in his tone evident. “What my baby got planned for today?”

You bit your lip, smiling. “Just a quick Target and BJ’s run to stock the house up for you, then I gotta get my nails done. Oh, and I gotta swing by the post office to pick up my bundles that came in.”

He chuckled, low and knowing. “Mmm, you tryna get fine for Big Daddy?”

“Mmhmm.” You giggled, rolling your eyes even though he couldn’t see you.

“Damn, girl…” His voice dropped a little lower, and you could almost see him licking his lips on the other end. “Ima eat that pussy like crazy, baby girl.”

Your breath hitched, a heat sparking between your thighs. “Terry!” You squealed, laughing. “Stop being nasty!”

“Nah, I’m deadass serious.” His tone was dark, full of hunger. “You don’t even know what you got coming.”

You took a steadying breath, trying to shake off the goosebumps crawling up your skin. “Listen, nasty man, we need to talk.” Your tone shifted, getting serious. “Your attorney called me this morning. We need to discuss what he told me.”

“What he say?” There was a pause before he answered with a serious tone.

You exhaled. “Baby…” You gripped the phone tighter, staring at the batter as if it had the answers. “It’s about your release.”

Terry was silent for a moment, and you could feel the shift in his energy through the phone. That easy, teasing tone from before was gone, replaced by something heavier—something cautious.

“What about it?” His voice was lower now, tight with restraint.

You sighed, setting the whisk down and gripping the edge of the counter. “He said they’re still waiting on the judge to sign off, and it could go either way. Either parole or full release.” You paused, running your tongue over your lips. “I asked if you’d be home by my birthday, and he said that’s what they’re pushing for, but the judge has to approve it first and it appears the judge is taking their sweet ass time. Same shit you told me last night.”

“Man… I been waiting years for this moment. If they try to stall this shit…” Terry sucked his teeth, exhaling sharply through his nose.

“Baby, don’t even put that energy in the air,” You cut in quickly, gripping the phone. “It’s gonna happen. You just gotta hold tight.”

“I’m tryna hold tight, ma, but you don’t understand. I been locked down since I was eighteen. Half my life. I done played by they rules, kept my nose clean, did everything I was supposed to do. And now, when it’s finally my time to touch down, they wanna drag they feet?” His frustration was raw, and you didn’t blame him one bit.

“That’s why we gotta be smart about this,” You soothed, lowering your voice. “Your attorney said you need to walk a fine line, Terry. These COs and some of them inmates? They don’t want to see you win, baby. You getting out means they lose power over you. And if you let ‘em get under your skin, if you give them any reason to stall this—”

“I know, baby,” He gritted, cutting you off. “I ain’t stupid.”

“I never said you were,” You softened, biting your lip. “But you know they’ll do anything to keep a black man locked up. You know that. You can’t afford to slip.”

Another deep sigh. “I just wanna be with you, ma,” He admitted, his voice quieter now, the vulnerability cutting through all the frustration. “That’s all I been holding on to. You. Us. The life we ‘bout to have.”

“And you will be with me, Terry. Soon. I promise.” Your heart clenched, and you closed your eyes for a second.

“You the only thing keeping me sane right now, baby,” He muttered. “You really are.”

“And you the only man I want. Ain’t nothing gon’ change that.” You swallowed hard, that warmth creeping back into your chest.

He went quiet for a beat, then, “Damn, you really love me, huh?”

“Boy, you already know.” You chuckled, shaking your head.

“Say it,” He murmured.

“I love you, Terrance Richmond.” You bit your lip, smiling.

A deep exhale came through the line, like those words alone were enough to ground him. “I love you too, ma. More than you even know.”

“You better love me with your fine self.” You giggled, continuing to whisk the batter. He chuckled lowly, the sound making your ears perk up at the nostalgic sound.

“You know I want a baby soon as possible, right? Just like we talked about.” Terry’s voice dipped even lower, that familiar edge of possession curling around his words.

“I know, baby.” You bit your lip, warmth spreading through your belly at the certainty in his tone.

“Nah,” He pressed. “I mean, soon as I get home, I’m filling you up. I ain’t playing.”

A giggle bubbled out of you. “Well, that’s good to know,” You teased, twisting a strand of hair between your fingers. “Because I already got off my birth control, and I’m ovulating real soon.”

Silence. Then a sharp inhale from Terry. “You serious?”

“Mmhmm.” A smirk played on your lips

“Good,” He growled. “‘Cause I ain’t pulling out. I want you pregnant, mama. You carrying my son or my baby girl. I already see it.”

A deep shudder rolled through you at the sheer conviction in his voice. There was no hesitation, no doubt—he wanted this, just like you did. Now you knew having a baby before a ring wasn’t the most conventional thing. You were raised better than that, taught that marriage first was the way to go, that being someone’s “baby mama” wasn’t the move. But Terry? He wasn’t that type of man. This wasn’t some half-thought-out, heat-of-the-moment decision. You knew exactly what you were signing up for. From the moment you told him you wanted his baby, he made it crystal clear—both you and that child would have his last name. There would be no question, no hesitation. You weren’t about to be just someone’s BM. You were his woman, his future wife.

The plan was already in motion—soon as he got out, y’all were hitting the courthouse and making it official. No long engagement, no drawn-out wedding planning stress. He wanted to be your husband immediately. And once he was settled, once he was back on his feet, working and bringing in real money, then he’d give you that big wedding, the

one with the flowers, the dress, the family all gathered to watch you walk down the aisle. But for now? The paper, the commitment, you—that’s what mattered most to him.

It wasn’t like you weren’t set up already. You made damn good money, and your degree in business administration had you sitting pretty in a high-paying corporate consulting job, helping multi-million-dollar firms streamline their operations. Your salary was more than enough to hold things down while Terry got back on his feet, and you’d already mapped out a business plan to help him reintegrate. Finding a job after doing seventeen years inside wasn’t easy, but you had resources, connections, a plan. You weren’t just bringing him home—you were making sure he stayed home. You were building a life with this man, and every step of it felt right.

“You think your family gon’ like me?” Terry exhaled through the phone, his deep voice softening just a little. Your smile, bright and easy just seconds ago, slowly faded. It was a fair question. A real one. But it wasn’t an easy one to answer. You knew your mama. Sweet, nurturing, and warm when she wanted to be, but judgmental as hell. A devout Christian woman—saved, sanctified, and filled with the Holy Ghost. She wasn’t fond of anything remotely sinful, and Terry… well, Terry was the walking definition of sinful.

There was no denying he was a fine-ass man. That wasn’t the issue. Standing tall at 6’3”, with those piercing hazel eyes that seemed to shift between ocean-gray and a stormy blue-green depending on the light. Rich, light caramel skin that deepened into a golden bronze in the summer but softened into a fairer hue in the colder months. A strong, chiseled jawline that made him look both dangerous and regal. His lips? Plump, full, always looking like they were ready to be kissed—or used for something far nastier. His short-cropped curly fro was just long enough to grab, and those thick, corded muscles? Yeah. His time behind bars didn’t just sculpt his body—it turned him into a damn statue, cut from flesh instead of marble. His tattoos, inked along his thick arms, added to his edge. Especially that sleeve—his latest one, a masterpiece he got done while inside.

He was the kind of man that turned heads when he walked into a room. The kind that made women cross their legs and bite their lip. But he wasn’t the “good, God-fearing man” your mother had envisioned for you. Terry was the complete opposite. And yet, his heart was the purest thing about him. Despite his past, despite the anger and the hurt buried deep in his soul, he was a good man. A gentle soul trapped in an exterior so hard, so intimidating, most people never got to see the real him.

You inhaled sharply, trying to find the right words. “Baby, I gotta be honest with you.”

“Mmhmm?” His voice was calm.

You sighed. “I don’t know. My mama… she can be a bit much. And the fact that I’ve been hiding this—hiding us—for the past two years? Oh, she gon’ have a fit. And my sister? Whew, she gon’ have a mouth full too. You’d probably have better luck with my aunties than my own mama.”

Terry chuckled, a deep, warm sound that made your stomach flutter. “I get it, baby. I do.” His voice was soft, understanding. “But I ain’t going nowhere. She can side-eye me, throw oil on me, pray over me ‘til she blue in the face—I’m still gon’ be here. And I’ma do whatever I can to make her love me. To make her see I ain’t some monster. ‘Cause I want this, ma. I want us. I want your family to be my family, too.”

That made you smile. A big one. The kind that deepened your dimples and warmed you from the inside out. But there was something else weighing on you. Something heavy. Something you knew Terry wouldn’t want to talk about, but you had to ask.

You hesitated before carefully pushing forward. “Baby… you gon’ reach out to your mama once you’re free?”

“Nah, Y/N. I’m not.” He answered, his voice, tight and clipped.

You swallowed. “Baby—”

“Ain’t like she gave a fuck about me in the first place,” he cut you off, his voice colder now. “I’m in here ‘cause of her. You know that.”

“I know. I do. But, baby… you gotta forgive. Not for her. For you. You need peace, Terry. You deserve that.” You exhaled slowly. His breathing was heavier now, like he was trying to keep himself from slipping into that dark place. You hated when he went there. When the bitterness and resentment started to eat away at him.

“I got peace, baby. I got you.” His voice softened just a little, but you could still hear the hurt beneath it. “That’s all I need.”

“I hear you baby.” You softly replied. You decided to respect his wishes and let the conversation about his mother rest. He had been through enough, and you weren’t about to push him into something he wasn’t ready for. Instead, you brightened up, shifting the energy as you let out a little squeal.

“Oh! Baby, my birthday dress came!” You announced excitedly, twirling a loose curl around your finger. “I can’t wait for you to see me in it.”

Terry’s smirk was damn near audible through the phone. “Oh yeah?” His voice dropped an octave, turning rich and smooth like warm honey. “That’s cool, baby… ‘cause I can’t wait to take that shit off you.”

“It is literally nine in the morning, and you already on go.” You chuckled, shaking your head.

“Because I got this pretty, brown-eyed woman waiting on me,” He murmured. “And I can’t stop staring at her picture, picturing our life together beyond these walls. I just need my woman bad.” He let out a breath, voice thick with longing. “I wanna turn your body inside out, have you laid up exhausted, and then make you breakfast in the morning while you recover, boo.”

“Leave the cooking to me, Richmond. Don’t need you burning our house up.” You smirked, scratching your head. You hadn’t even realized you said it like that—our house—until the words left your lips. But Terry caught it instantly. His heart swelled, warmth spreading through his chest like wildfire.

“Our,” He repeated, grinning through the phone. “I like the sound of that. And don’t worry, baby. I could never destroy anything of ours.” His words settled over you like a warm embrace, making your stomach flutter.

Terry cleared his throat after a beat. “So, your girls still takin’ you out for your birthday?”

“Mmhmm,” You confirmed, stretching lazily. “We’re hitting this grown and sexy lounge. Got a section, a table, should be real nice. I just wanted something low-key. Nothing too crazy.”

Terry hummed in approval. “That’s what’s up. You think your girls gon’ accept me?”

You snorted. “They’re gonna love you. Especially Deja. Sonya, though… she might take a minute. She’s Miss Fake Bougie, swearing she a real housewife of Atlanta. But deep down, she’s chill. Just real protective of me.”

Terry let out a low chuckle. “Aight, sounds like a plan, baby girl. Long as they ain’t plotting to run me off, we cool.”

“Never that.” You smiled, resting your chin in your hand, leaning on the countertop.

“Mm. Aight, tell me this, then—what’s the first meal I’m getting when I come home?” He inquired, with a devious smirk.

“Well, I was thinking… me.” Your voice became real seductive, tilting your head.

Terry’s laughter rumbled through the phone, low and sinful. “Ain’t no thinking, that’s a guarantee. But just to be safe, cook us something for after, ‘cause we gon’ need the strength.”

“Terry, you so damn silly.” You burst out laughing, shaking your head at him.

“You love it,” He teased, and he wasn’t wrong. Because behind all that reserved, stoic energy, Terry Richmond was a damn goofball at heart. And he was your goofball. The conversation between you and Terry continued, the two of you just vibing, killing time before you had to finally pull yourself away and get in the shower. He told you about a wild dream he had last night—some crazy mix of old memories and future fantasies of the two of you together.

“Man, I swear, I had the realest dream, baby,” He said, voice lazy and deep. “We was laid up in this big-ass house, had the baby in the crib next to us… you was wearin’ my T-shirt, lookin’ all sexy with your lil’ bonnet on, and I just kept pullin’ you closer, not even tryna let you sleep.”

“So you gon’ keep me up even in your dreams?” You laughed, rolling onto your side, twirling the bedsheets between your fingers.

“Hell yeah,” He said without hesitation. “I been starvin’, baby. Soon as I touch down, I’m eatin’ you up, kissin’ on you, makin’ love to you every chance I get. You gon’ be sick of me.”

“Never that daddy,” You murmured, feeling warmth spread through your body at just the thought of how it would feel to finally have him home.

“Bet,” He chuckled, then let out a deep sigh. “I just be sittin’ in this cell picturing it, picturing us—you in the tub, all soaped up, candles lit, slow jams playin’… me right behind you, holdin’ you close, runnin’ my hands all over that soft ass skin, kissing up your neck… licking on your nipples..”

Your breath hitched, already envisioning the exact same thing. You had put together a playlist for his arrival—nothing but the smoothest 90s and early 2000s R&B, songs that made you wanna melt into somebody’s arms.

“You wanna know what I was thinking about?” You asked, biting your lip.

“What, baby?” He feigned innocence.

“How you gon’ be sneakin’ into the shower while I’m tryna get ready for work,” you giggled. “Talkin’ about, ‘lemme wake you up the right way’—like I don’t have places to be!”

Terry laughed but then hummed in approval. “Shit, I am waking you up the right way. Gon’ have you walkin’ into work with a smile so big, they gon’ know somebody put it there.”

Your stomach flipped at the thought, heat rising to your cheeks. You were so gone for this man. “You just wait, Richmond,”You teased, sighing dramatically. “You about to be a full-time distraction.”

“That’s my plan, baby.” He grinned through the phone.

After a few more minutes of sweet talk, you finally sighed. “Alright, I need to get in the shower before I lay here and talk to you all day.”

“I ain’t stoppin’ you,” Terry teased. “I just wanna hear the water runnin’. Let me close my eyes and imagine it.”

“Boy, bye!” You laughed, shaking your head before reluctantly hanging up.

—

The hot water cascaded over your skin as you leaned against the shower wall, letting the warmth soak into your muscles. Your mind was racing with all the intimate moments you’d been daydreaming about since Terry’s release date became a real possibility. Late nights soaking in the tub together, his strong arms wrapped around you, his lips trailing along your shoulder. Waking up to him pulling you into his body, whispering in your ear before making love to you first thing in the morning. The idea of sharing a home, a bed, a life with him made your stomach flip with anticipation. You had been living alone for so long, moving on your own schedule, answering to no one. But now, there would be him. His things mixed with yours, his scent lingering in your sheets, his presence filling the empty spaces. And you couldn’t wait.

Once you finished luxuriating, you stepped out, wrapping yourself in a plush towel. You took your time getting dressed—pulling on a pair of black leggings that hugged your curves and a Nike sports bra, slipping into your most comfortable sneakers. You tied your hair into a sleek bun, then grabbed a baseball cap to shield your eyes from the Georgia sun. After grabbing your Louis Vuitton Speedy 30, you were just about to head out the door when your phone rang and you saw it was Sonya.

You sighed before answering, already bracing yourself. “What’s up, girl?”

“Mm, what you got going on today?” She asked, her tone full of suspicion, like she knew you were up to something.

“Just about to make a quick Target and BJ’s run,” You said casually, hoping she’d just let it go.

“Oh, perfect! I need to hit Target anyway! I’ll meet you there.” She stated. You internally cringed. Sonya didn’t know about Terry yet. And you definitely didn’t need her up in your cart asking a hundred questions about all the men’s products you were grabbing.

“Girl, I’m moving quick today,” You abruptly said, trying to throw her off. “Gotta be in and out, no time for browsing.”

“Please, you never just ‘run in’ anywhere,” Sonya scoffed. “I’ll keep up.”

“Sonya…” You huffed, rubbing your temple.

“What?” She laughed. “Why you sound so stressed? You tryna move funny or somethin’?”

“You know I move funny, that ain’t new.”You let out a dry laugh.

“Mhm, and that’s exactly why I’m coming.” She snickered.

You sighed dramatically, knowing there was no way out of this now. “Fine, I’ll see you there,” You relented, already planning how you were going to strategically avoid letting her see all the things you were picking up for Terry. You hurried up and grabbed your car keys and your Stanley cup from your kitchen counter before heading right out the door to your car. You hit the unlock button on your key fob and heard the chirp. Sliding into the plush leather seat of your Mercedes-Benz, you place your Stanley cup in the cupholder before pressing the push-to-start button. The engine purrs to life, and before you can even adjust the air, the CarPlay screen lights up, immediately blasting the smooth, honeyed vocals of Maxwell’s “Fortunate” through the speakers.

Your heart leaps in excitement. “SING IT, MAXWELL!” You squeal, gripping the steering wheel and swaying your shoulders as if you’re right there on stage with him.

This is your song. Terry’s song. The one he always sings to you over the phone—completely off-key but with so much passion, like he’s pouring every piece of himself into it. You can still hear him now—“I never sang a song with all my might…”—his deep, rough voice twisting the lyrics into something that sounds nothing like Maxwell, but you never cared. It was him. It was you. It was love. You pull out of the driveway, easing onto the streets of Atlanta, the sun gleaming against the hood of your Benz. The beat of the song wraps around you, filling every inch of the car with warmth. With one hand on the wheel and the other tapping rhythmically against your thigh, you let the city move around you, the skyline stretching high above as you feel the music, feel the love behind every lyric. Terry is coming home. Soon. And as Maxwell’s voice croons through the speakers, you let yourself dream—of slow dances in the living room, of his arms pulling you close as you sway to this very song, of him pressing soft kisses along your shoulder while mumbling the lyrics into your ear.You exhale, your lips curling into a soft, knowing smile. It’s only a matter of time.

Pulling into the Target parking lot, you let out a long, heavy sigh, gripping the wheel as you mentally prepared yourself for Sonya. You loved your girl—no doubt about it. Sonya was one of those ride-or-die friends who would cut up with you on a Saturday night and pray with you on Sunday morning. But she was also the kind of woman who didn’t know the meaning of boundaries. She always had to be up in the mix, tasting the flavor, giving unsolicited advice even when it wasn’t needed. And it wasn’t that you didn’t want to share Terry with your girls—because you did. He was your man, and you were proud of him.

But you wanted to make sure this was real. That this was happening. That he was actually going to be home before you started bragging and boasting about him to your family and friends. You couldn’t count how many times you’d gotten excited about a brotha, only for him to turn out to be a disappointment. And every time, you had to do the walk of shame, explaining to everyone that it didn’t work out. You hated the look of disappointment on your mother’s face, the I told you so smirk on your sister’s lips, and God forbid Sonya’s infamous, “I knew that nigga wasn’t shit.” speeches. And then there was Deja, who always chimed in with, “Girl, want me to get my cousin to kill him?”

You loved your girls, but the last two years had been a sacred kind of peace. You had cultivated this private, intense, deeply intimate relationship with Terry while he was behind bars, and there was something pure about keeping it just between the two of you. You knew that sometimes, outside influence could ruin a good thing, and you weren’t ready to share your world just yet. But if things aligned perfectly—if the odds were in your favor, if the judge signed off, and if God was looking out for you—then they would meet him the night of your birthday outing. You just hoped everything would fall into place. You hopped out of the car, grabbing your Louis Vuitton Speedy 30 from the passenger seat and slinging it over your arm. Just as you shut the door, you spotted Sonya standing near the entrance, her arms crossed, her stance already radiating irritation. You took a deep inhale, bracing yourself, then walked over, greeting her with a quick hug.

“Girl, what’s wrong with you?” You asked, noticing her sour expression.

“Chile, my damn hairstylist just sent me that infamous ‘Hey boo’ text, and I just know it’s about to be some bullshit.” Sonya sucked her teeth and rolled her eyes.

“That’s why I told you to stop going to her, Sonya. She’s unprofessional as hell and always canceling on you at the last minute.” You snorted and shook your head.

“I know, I know,” She whined dramatically, throwing her hands up. “But girl, she know how to lay my damn wigs. She makes that lace look like scalp! I do not wanna go to nobody else!”

You laughed, grabbing a cart and rolling into the store with her. You weren’t even five steps inside before you gave her a knowing look and smirked. “I don’t even know why you waste your time getting them wigs laid, knowing Omar gon’ pull that shit right off your head and have your lace looking crazy by the end of the night.”

“You ain’t lying, girl. You really ain’t lying.” Sonya stuck her tongue out at you before giggling, clearly thinking about how wild her and her man got.

You shook your head, laughing as you made your way toward the laundry aisle, grabbing detergent, fabric softener, and some cleaning products. You wanted the house to be

perfect for Terry’s homecoming—fresh sheets, the scent of lavender and vanilla in the air, everything spotless for his arrival.

As you reached for a bottle of Febreze, Sonya nudged you. “So… you excited for your birthday?”

“Yeah… I really am.” You smiled, biting your lip as you nodded. Truth be told you were more excited for Terry’s arrival than your own birthday. For as long as you could remember you weren’t the most excited to celebrate your birthday. To you, it was just another day and another reminder that you were leaving your glorious twenties and getting closer to hitting your dirty thirties. That is until Terry came into your life and shifted your perspective on life itself. He taught you that every birthday should be celebrated and that life is too short to not celebrate the breath in your lungs and waking up everyday. Especially with his circumstances and how his life got snatched from him because he chose to do the right thing and defend his mother’s honor against her abuser, but in the end it wasn’t so honorable and his dreams and young life got cut short with the snap of a finger. So this year you chose to have a better outlook on your birthday, thanks to your baby Terry.

You continued to move swiftly through Target, pushing your cart with concentration, mentally checking off everything Terry will need once he’s home. You start with the Dove Men+Care bar soap, grabbing a few packs because you know the fresh, clean scent will suit him. Next is the Old Spice body wash—the deep, rich, masculine fragrance makes you weak in the knees, so you know it’ll be perfect for him. You toss it in the cart, followed by men’s deodorant, mouthwash, and toothpaste—because even though you’ve never stood close enough to breathe him in, you already decided that your man will smell fresh, clean, and irresistible.

You head down the haircare aisle, running your fingers over the different bottles before settling on a moisturizing shampoo and conditioner. You know prison air is dry as hell, and you’re not about to have your man coming home with his hair brittle and neglected. A large jar of Palmer’s whipped cocoa butter goes into the cart next—you love how smooth and rich it feels against your skin, and you can already picture yourself rubbing it into his arms, his shoulders, his hands… making sure he’s soft and well taken care of. Just as you’re reaching for a pack of Dude Wipes, Sonya turns from the next aisle, glancing over at your cart. She tilts her head, her perfectly arched brows raising as she takes in all the men’s products sitting inside.

“Uh-uh. Who’s all this for?” She asks, crossing her arms. Your heart skips a beat.

“Oh!” You force out a laugh, thinking quick. “My sister’s in town with her fiancé, and they’re staying at my mom’s house. She needed some stuff to keep there for him.”

Sonya narrows her eyes for a second, then shrugs. “Oh okay, that makes sense. I was about to say, girl, you got a whole grown man’s starter kit in there.”

You laugh nervously, nodding as you grip the handle of your cart, pushing forward. Just when you think you’re in the clear, your phone buzzes in your purse. You glance down and see the caller ID: Terry’s lawyer. Your stomach instantly tightens. He already called earlier—so why is he calling again?

“Hey, hold on,” You tell Sonya, trying to keep your voice light. “I gotta take this real quick.”

“Cool, I’ll meet you at checkout.” Sonya waves you off, already distracted by something on the next shelf. Stepping out of the aisle, you answer, pressing the phone to your ear.

“Hello?” You answer, voice low.

“We’ve got a problem,” His lawyer says, his voice urgent.Your body stiffens.

“What? What happened?” You held your breath.

“There’s been an incident in the prison yard. Terry was involved.” He deeply sighs. Your heart plummets straight to your ass because you told this nigga—.

“WHAT?!” You shout, loud enough that people around you turn their heads. You clamp a hand over your mouth, forcing yourself to breathe, to stay calm.

“I’m still gathering details,” His lawyer continues, “ But from what I’m hearing, there was some kind of altercation. If the judge catches wind of this, his release could be revoked… or at the very least, stalled.”

The words ring in your ears, drowning out the noise of the store. Revoked?! Stalled?!Your hands start to tremble on the cart handle, your vision blurring with tears. Just when you thought you were so close to having him home—just when everything was falling into place—here comes some bullshit.

“Please… just tell me he’s okay,” you whisper, your voice cracking. You swallow hard, gripping the phone tighter.

“I really don’t know. I’m working on it. I’ll call you back when I know more.” He sighed again, sounding defeated. Then the line goes dead, making you tear up. You stood frozen in the middle of Target, your world spinning, your stomach in knots. And just like that, everything you had been dreaming of, praying for, feels like it’s slipping right through your fingers.

This couldn't be happening right now, not right now....

@captainwithoutmakingitlove

@naughtynolly-blog

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@nahimjustfeelingit-writes

@fakxmbj

@solunaseira

@noir-lullaby

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#aaron pierre #terry richmond #mufasa #rebel ridge #green lantern #terry richmond x plus size reader #terry richmond x black oc #terry richmond x reader #terry richmond x black female reader #terry richmond x black reader #terry richmond fic #terry richmond fanfiction #terry richmond smut #rebel ridge fanfiction #terry richmond x y/n #black fic writer #Spotify

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coolemmasulivan2 · 15 hours ago

Text

A Beautiful Mess | 1

Pairing: Lando Norris x Reader

Summary: Two neighbors who can’t stand each other, until an accidental kiss changes everything.

Word count: 2846

But close ain't close enough 'Till we cross the line So name a game to play And I'll roll the dice, hey

You and Lando Norris had a problem with each other. There was no denying it. Something about the other person made your skin prickle with irritation, like an itch you couldn't scratch.

You were a Monegasque kindergarten teacher, a job that suited you perfectly. You adored kids. Their joy and innocence made your life simpler.

Monaco had always been your sanctuary: peaceful, elegant, yours. But that changed the moment Lando moved in next door a few years back.

You got along with everyone. It was just who you were. Friendly, patient, easygoing. But him? He was the exception. Loud, cocky, and an absolute menace of a neighbor. Even if he spent most of the year traveling, when he was home, he made sure you knew. The roaring engines, the late-night laughter, the endless stream of people coming and going. It was chaos wrapped in luxury.

He could've lived anywhere. He had the money. But somehow, out of all the places in Monaco, he chose your building.

"I guess Lando's back?" Your sister said, raising an eyebrow as loud music blasted from the apartment next door.

You let out a deep sigh, chopping vegetables with more force than necessary. "He's been back for a while… unfortunately."

A smirk tugged at her lips. "Let me guess, he did something already?"

"Oh, just parked in my spot today. Again." You shot her an exasperated look before slamming the knife against the cutting board. "Someday I'll kill him. I swear."

She chuckled. "Maybe he's running out of places to park his collection."

"I don't care!" You huffed. "He's a billionaire, he can buy a garage. Or better yet, move to a bigger place and stop being my problem."

"You know he does all of this just to piss you off, right?" Your sister said as she sat at the dining table, watching you set down the salad. "You should just ignore him."

"I know!" You groaned, sinking into the chair across from her. "But I can't. He's impossible to ignore. He knows exactly how to push my buttons."

Lando and Max were deep into a racing simulator session, music blasting through the apartment as they waited for their food to be ready.

It was Max's turn on the sim, but the pounding music was messing with his concentration. "Dude, the music... turn it down." He grumbled, eyes locked on the screen.

Lando barely glanced up from his phone. "Why?"

"Because I can't focus! It's too damn loud." Max tried to keep his attention on the race. "Someone's going to complaine about the noise." Then a thought struck him. He paused the race and shot Lando a knowing look. "Wait a second… You want this, don't you?"

Lando shrugged. "No idea what you're talking about."

Max scoffed. "Bullshit. You're trying to piss her off. You want her to came here. That's why the music's so loud. What's your problem with her?"

Lando smirked, eyes flicking back to his phone. "It's fun watching her all worked up."

Max shook his head, half amused, half exasperated. "You know, she's actually really nice."

Lando snorted. "To you and everyone else. Not to me."

"Yeah, because you're an asshole."

Lando finally dropped his phone onto the desk and leaned back in his chair. "She's been like that since day one. She started it."

"And instead of finding out why, you just decided to make things worse." Max said, shaking his head. "Classic you!"

Before Lando could fire back, a knock on the door echoed through the apartment.

His smirk widened. "Told you, she can't stay away." He pushed up from his seat, heading for the door.

Max groaned, calling after him, "Dude, be nice, please!"

You bit your nails, pacing as you waited for Lando to answer his door. Normally, you were a calm and patient person. But Lando Norris had a talent for bringing out the absolute worst in you. And the worst part? He enjoyed it. You knew he did.

Inside your apartment you heard the door finally open.

"Hi!" Your sister's voice rang out, soft and sweet, just like she always was. Unlike you, she had never raised her voice in frustration, not even to assholes like Lando.

"Oh, hi!" Lando's voice dripped with warmth, and you immediately rolled your eyes. Of course, he could turn on the charm when he wanted to.

"Sorry to bother you…"

"No problem!" He said. You nearly gagged.

"Could you turn the music down a little?" Your sister asked politely.

"Yeah, of course. Sorry about that, I didn't even realize it was that loud. Really, I'm so sorry."

Your jaw nearly hit the floor.

You had stood at his door countless times, asking the same thing, and every single time, he would gave you a cocky remark, or worst of all, he'd turned the music up louder just to spite you. But with your sister? He was suddenly the picture of politeness.

You were seconds away from storming out of your apartment to tell him exactly what you thought of his two-faced behavior, but your sister's voice stopped you.

"I appreciate it. Goodnight."

"Goodnight!" Lando replied smoothly. You let out a deep breath, leaning your head against the wall in frustration. Your sister had just started pushing the door open when Lando added: "Oh, and say hi to your sister for me."

That was it. You clenched your fists, shoving past your sister, ready to wipe that smug grin off his face, but before you could get a single word out, his door clicked shut.

"I hate him so much."

From the other side of the door, Lando grinned like an idiot, watching you through the peephole as you stomped away in frustration.

"There's just something special about pissing her off." He mused, clearly enjoying himself.

Max, standing behind him with his arms crossed, let out a sigh. "You're an idiot."

Two days had passed since your sister left for Rome, where she lived with her boyfriend. You were alone again, not that it bothered you. Your parents still lived in Monaco, in the house you grew up in, and you saw them almost every day.

One of the things you loved most about Monaco was being so close to the ocean. Every morning, as soon as you opened your bedroom window, you would close your eyes and breathe it in—the salty air, the gentle breeze, the familiar scent that made you feel at home. It was the perfect way to start the day, making your morning run that much easier.

Like always, before heading to work, you laced up your shoes and stepped outside. Today was no exception.

You had been running for a while, sweat clinging to your skin as your breath fell into a steady rhythm. The music playing softly in your ears didn't drown out the sounds of the city.

Lost in thought, you instinctively turned toward your building, crossing the road without a second glance.

The loud sound of tires screeching against the asphalt snapped you out of your trance. A rush of air whooshed past as a sleek car came to a sudden stop just inches from you. Your heart leaped into your throat, your body reacting before your mind caught up. You stumbled back and before you could stop yourself, you were on the ground.

The driver's side door swung open, and before you even looked up, you knew exactly who it was.

Lando stepped out, his expression a mix of worry and frustration, but before he could speak, you were already pushing yourself to your feet, your hands shaking slightly from the adrenaline.

"Are you insane?" You snapped, ripping your airpods out. "You almost ran me over!"

His brows shot up. "Me? You're the one who ran straight into the road without looking!"

You opened your mouth to argue, but the truth of his words sank in. Still, there was no way you were letting him win this. "Maybe if you weren't driving like a lunatic--"

Lando scoffed, running a hand through his hair. "Driving like a lunatic? I was literally pulling out of the garage."

You huffed, brushing the dirt off your leggings. "What if it was a kid crossing instead of me?"

"Then I would've stopped, just like I did now." He shot back. "But you... You didn't even look before stepping onto the road! What were you thinking?"

"I was thinking that I wouldn't have to worry about being flattened by my obnoxious neighbor before eight in the morning!"

Lando shook his head, a smirk tugging at his lips. "You're unbelievable."

"You're infuriating."

"You're dramatic."

"You're--"

"Y/n?" A new voice cut through the tension, making both of you turn. Standing a few feet away was your kindergarten director. Dressed in his usual grey suit, he raised an eyebrow at the two of you. "Is everything alright?" He asked.

You cleared your throat, suddenly aware of how ridiculous this must have looked, standing in the middle of the street, flustered, sweaty, and arguing with a F1 driver.

"Yes, everything's fine!" You said quickly, forcing a polite smile.

Monsieur Bernard nodded, then glanced at Lando. "I didn't realize you knew such a famous driver, Y/n!" He stretched his hand and Lando shook it.

You resisted the urge to roll your eyes. "We're just neighbors."

Lando grinned. "Very close neighbors."

You shot him a glare, but before you could say anything, Monsieur Bernard continued. "You know, our little ones love racing. It would be wonderful if you could visit the school sometime, talk to the kids about it."

"Oh!" You forced a polite chuckle. "I'm sure Lando is far too busy. I wouldn't want to take up his time."

Lando, to your absolute horror, shrugged. "Actually, I think it's a great idea." You snapped your head toward him, eyes wide. "Yeah, why not? I've got some time before the season starts again. I'd love to come by."

Monsieur Bernard smiled. "That's wonderful! Y/n, can you please set everything up?" You smiled and nodded. "Thank you, Mr. Norris. It was nice to meet you."

"Likewise." As Monsieur Bernard walked away, you groaned, rubbing your temples. Lando chuckled, slipping his hands into his pockets. "See? I can be a good neighbor."

You exhaled sharply, turning on your heel toward your building. "I hope the kids throw paint at you."

Lando chuckled, watching you storm off, clearly frustrated with how the day had started. His gaze lingered for a moment longer than necessary and not even he could deny that your ass looked good on those leggings.

"Stop it, Lando!" He muttered to himself, shaking his head as if it would physically shake the thoughts away. "Don't go there."

With a deep breath, he slid back into his car, gripping the steering wheel a little tighter than necessary. Without another glance at the building, he drove off.

You lay in bed, scrolling through your phone, hoping to lull yourself to sleep. The soft glow of the screen was the only light in the room, your thumb moving lazily over the screen, until something in your feed made you pause.

Your eyes narrowed as you clicked on the reel. A fan edit of your annoying neighbor filled your screen, all set to a song that did nothing to make him look innocent. Quite the opposite.

Your breath hitched slightly, your eyes locked on the video as if trapped in some kind of trance. The way he carried himself, the confidence, the effortless charm-- No. Absolutely not.

The reel restarted, snapping you out of whatever trance had just taken over you. With a horrified gasp, you jolted upright, tossing your phone onto the bed like it had burned you.

"Ugh-- no. What the hell?" You threw a pillow at your phone, like the device was alive. "Even on my phone?" You groaned, burying your face in your hands.

This man was infiltrating every corner of your life. And you hated it.

The day had arrived.

The kids had been buzzing with excitement all week, their energy doubling ever since they learned that Lando Norris was coming to visit. It didn't matter that half of them were too young to understand F1, but the mere idea of someone fast and famous coming to their school had them bouncing off the walls. You, on the other hand, were bracing yourself for chaos.

You had done your best to keep the kids calm, but by the time the morning rolled around, they were practically vibrating with anticipation. What car does he drive? Will he let us race? Can he do drive in the playground?

And then, Lando arrived. Dressed in his McLaren clothes, sunglasses and wearing that signature smile.

The kids lost their minds. "Landoooooo!" The group rushed toward him, bombarding him with questions before he could even say a word.

"Whoa, whoa, one at a time!" Lando laughed, crouching down to be at their level.

You stood at a distance, arms crossed, watching as he handled the chaos with surprising ease.

"Can you drive faster than Batman?"

"Can we race you?"

"Do you get scared when you go super fast?"

Lando hesitated for a second, then grinned. "Sometimes! But that's what makes it exciting."

You rolled your eyes. Still, you couldn't deny that the kids adored him. They hung onto their seats, eyes wide with fascination as he described what it felt like to race at over 300 km/h, how he trained, and even how he sometimes got nervous before big races.

Somewhere in the middle of the chaos, you realized that Lando was actually good at this. He had their full attention, something you usually had to work twice as hard for.

And then, as if sensing your thoughts, he caught your eye from across the room and winked, making you gag.

Unfortunately for Lando, someone else caught the moment.

A little girl sitting nearby tilted her head curiously, her big eyes flicking between the two of you. "Is Miss Y/n your girlfriend?" She asked innocently.

Lando, who had just taken a sip of water, immediately started coughing. He nearly choked, hand flying to his chest as he struggled to recover. "What?"

You, on the other hand, wanted the earth to swallow you whole. The rest of the kids, now very interested, turned toward you both with excited expressions.

"Is that why you're here?" Another girl asked, eyes wide with curiosity.

"Do you live together?" A boy asked before Lando could even recover from the first question.

Lando, still slightly choking, looked horrified.

"Nope!" You cut in quickly, clapping your hands together in a desperate attempt to redirect the conversation. "Who wants to show Lando their artwork?"

A chorus of Me! Me! Me! erupted, and just like that, the kids forgot all about their matchmaking attempts, eagerly rushing to grab their drawings.

You let out a slow breath, glancing at Lando, who was still lightly hitting his chest.

"What the hell just happened?" He asked, his voice still uneven.

You crossing your arms. "They're kids, Lando! If you wink at their teacher, this is what you get."

"A vision of a nightmare?"

You shot him a glare. "Asshole!"

He smirked. "Such a dirty mouth for a kindergarten teacher."

Your jaw clenched. You took a deep breath, forcing a smile as sweet as honey. "And yet, still more mature than a F1 driver."

Lando grinned, leaning in just a little. "Debatable."

Before you could walk away from Lando, chaos erupted.

"Me first!"

"No, me!"

Two of the kids appeared out of nowhere, each clutching their artwork, too focused on their battle to notice where they were going. Straight into you.

You barely had time to react before they crashed into your legs, making you lose balance.

"Oh--"

Lando was sat in a chair right in front of you, and before you could steady yourself, you stumbled forward and fell right into him.

His hands instinctively came up to catch you, but it was too late. Your lips brushed against his. It was barely a touch, but enough to make the world stop.

The kids were still yelling, the classroom still buzzing with energy, completely unaware of what had just happened, but all you could register was the way your lips were still touching.

You quickly pulled back, eyes wide, heart racing. Lando blinked up at you, looking just as stunned, his lips slightly parted as if he wanted to speak but couldn’t find the words.

You straightened, feeling warmth creeping up your neck,

"This is my drawing." One of the kids said, tugging at Lando's sleeve. "It's a boat and this is my dad."

That snapped Lando out of it. He cleared his throat and looked away from you. "Wow, that's amazing! You're so talented."

You turned away quickly, your pulse still hammering as you focused on the children, pretending like nothing had happened.

Lando rubbed the back of his neck, still looking anywhere but at you.

For once, there were no smirks, no teasing, just the feeling that something between you had just shifted.

#f1 #lando norris imagine #lando imagine #lando x you #lando norris x you #lando norris #lando x reader #lando norris x reader #lando norris x y/n #ln4 fic #ln4 imagine #ln4

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mashtatosworld · 2 days ago

Text

we can't be friends

summary: in which friendship is a blurry line

warnings: angsty at a glance... mentions of alcohol

Jiyong slides into the booth beside you like he belongs there, thigh pressing against yours. Without thinking, he leans in and presses a kiss to your cheek.

You don’t react. You never do. It’s just muscle memory at this point.

Instead, you snap one of your breadsticks in half, offering him an end without looking. He takes it, eating absentmindedly as he rests an arm behind you, fingers brushing against skin of your shoulder, idly moving the thin strap that lay there.

Across the table, someone stares.

"You guys are unreal," Youngbae mutters, shaking his head.

You blink, finally glancing up. "What?"

"This. You." He gestures between you and Jiyong, exasperated. "How do you even call this friendship?"

Jiyong barely reacts, just steals another breadstick. "Easily."

You hum in agreement, lazily draping a hand on his thigh as you cross your legs beneath the table. He lets you, the action stealing his attention and causing his eyes to flicker over your face, too unreadable for your liking.

Youngbae laughs. "Right. Because normal friends kiss each other all the time."

Jiyong smirks, tilting his head toward you. "I mean, don’t they?"

And just like that, before you can even process it, he leans in and kisses you.

Not a peck, not a brush against the corner of your mouth - a real kiss. Slow. Lingering. The kind that would mean something if it weren’t you and him. It wasn't unusual for you to share them, but he was also never so brazen about it in front of others before.

You don’t pull away.

You never have.

When he finally leans back, a challenge lingers in his eyes, something unreadable curling at the edges of his smirk.

The whole table falls silent.

Your fingers twitch against your glass, but your voice is steady when you say, "See? Nothing weird about it. We're just friends."

And then you take a sip of your drink like nothing happened.

"Can we be friends, y/n?" Daesung asks with a wide grin. You roll your eyes with a scoff but you're glad it breaks the tension and shifts the conversation away from the unusual friendship you shared.

Jiyong chuckles under his breath, tongue swiping over his bottom lip, before slumping against the booth, arm draped behind you once again.

Youngbae sighs, exasperated. "You two are deluded."

No one argues.

Because at this point, what is there to say?

𓆩♡𓆪 𓆩♡𓆪 𓆩♡𓆪

Five years ago, in a crowded club:

The bass thumped through your chest, drinks making everything hazy. The group had dispersed a while ago, but you always stayed with him.

Jiyong was pressed against you in the crowd, mouth close to your ear.

"I love you." he murmured, voice barely audible over the music.

You smiled, tilting your head back, and without thinking, he kissed your face.

Quick. Light. Just a press of lips against your jaw.

You didn’t even blink. Just leaned towards him, dragging your fingers through his hair as you kissed him.

It wasn’t the first time.

It wouldn’t be the last.

And neither of you would ever bring it up.

𓆩♡𓆪 𓆩♡𓆪 𓆩♡𓆪

The rooftop is quiet, the city stretching below you.

Jiyong is beside you, quiet for once. You don’t speak either.

Then -

"You ever think about stopping?" he asks suddenly.

You glance at him. "Stopping what?"

He meets your gaze.

And you know.

The kisses. The touches. The way you orbit each other so closely, so constantly, that it stopped making sense years ago.

"Why would we?" you ask, voice light. "It works, doesn’t it?"

There was over a decade of friendship precariously balanced beneath whatever mess you and Jiyong had selfishly piled atop it. No one wanted to be the first to make their move, and watch it crumble to nothing.

He doesn’t answer.

Instead, he leans in, pressing the softest, most fleeting kiss to your lips.

Your breath catches.

Because this one feels different.

And suddenly, you realize -

This has never been casual.

Not for you. Not for him.

Never.

𓆩♡𓆪 𓆩♡𓆪 𓆩♡𓆪

one of my fav tropes

#kwon jiyong x reader #kwon jiyong #kpop #gdragon x reader #gdragon #bigbang

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julietsf1 · 3 days ago

Text

Home Again - Charles Leclerc x Reader

summary: eight years, one city, and a thousand unspoken words—will a chance encounter in London bring closure, or is there more in store for Monaco's golden boy and the one who got away? (4.5k words)

content: reunion, slight angst, unresolved feelings, childhood friends

AN: another Charles one! I felt like these tropes really suited his vibe, I hope you enjoy!! :)

____________________________________

London always felt like a city of paradoxes - chaotic yet calming, detached yet full of life. As I sipped my cappuccino at a small café tucked away in Soho, I let my mind wander. The same questions had lingered in my mind over the years, growing louder the longer I avoided them. Was it a mistake to leave? Should I have fought harder to keep in touch with him? With Charles?

I shook my head. No, leaving Monaco had been necessary. It was beautiful, yes, but it was like living inside a postcard, picture-perfect on the outside but so painfully hollow within. Everyone was constantly posturing, trying to outdo the next person in opulence, charm, or connections. It was exhausting.

And Charles… he was Monte Carlo personified in so many ways. Stunning, magnetic, the kind of person who made you feel alive just by being in his orbit. But there was something raw and real beneath that glossy exterior, something I’d always seen, even when no one else seemed to. I loved him for it. And maybe, in a way, I hated him too - for thriving in a place that felt like it would suffocate me.

The faint chime of the café door opening pulled me from my thoughts. I glanced up, expecting some trendy Londoner or a tourist fumbling with their map. But instead, my eyes landed on a familiar face, one I hadn’t seen in nearly a decade. Arthur Leclerc.

“Y/N?” His voice was incredulous, his eyebrows shooting up as he stopped mid-step. He looked exactly the same, just a bit taller, a bit sharper around the edges. Still the same boy I remembered from childhood, though, with that mischievous glint in his eye.

I blinked, unsure if I was hallucinating. “Arthur?”

He grinned, practically bounding over to my table. “Mon dieu, it is you! I wasn’t sure at first, but… wow, what are you doing in London?”

I gestured to my half-empty coffee cup. “Living here. What about you? I thought you’d be… I don’t know, in Monaco or racing somewhere glamorous.”

Arthur slid into the seat across from me without waiting for an invitation, his grin widening. “I was here for a sim session, actually. But you, London? I thought you’d be in Paris or some other philosophy capital, writing about Socrates or something.”

I laughed softly. “Close enough. I came here for university, and I never left.”

“Eight years.” His tone was lighter, but his words carried weight. “It’s been eight years, Y/N. Do you ever go back?”

The question hit me harder than I expected. I took a sip of my coffee to buy myself time. “No,” I admitted. “Not since… well, not since I left.”

Arthur’s expression softened, though confusion lingered in his eyes. “You just… left,” he said gently. “No one really understood why. Charles especially.”

I looked down at my coffee, the words caught in my throat. How could I explain the weight of feeling like an outsider in a world I was supposed to call home?

“I just needed to go,” I murmured. “It wasn’t about anyone else.”

Arthur studied me for a moment, then nodded slowly. “I guess I never really got it, but… if it’s what you needed, then fine.” He paused before leaning forward with a small smile. “Come back. Just for the weekend, for the Grand Prix. I think it’d mean a lot to everyone. To Charles.”

I bit my lip, unsure how to respond. The truth was, I’d thought about going back a hundred times. But every time, I chickened out. Monaco felt like a ghost town to me now, haunted by memories I wasn’t sure I was ready to face.

“I don’t know,” I said finally. “It’s complicated.”

“It doesn’t have to be,” Arthur said simply. He pulled out his phone and started typing something before I could protest. “There. I signed you up as my guest. No backing out now.”

I stared at him, equal parts annoyed and touched by his insistence. “What if I had plans already?”

“Cancel them,” he shot back with a wink. “But seriously, Y/N, it’s time. Come back. Just for a weekend. What’s the worst that could happen?”

I sighed, knowing I’d already lost this battle. And maybe he was right. Maybe it was time.

…

Monaco hadn’t changed. Not really.

The same sunlit streets curved around the cliffs, the same pastel buildings clung to the coastline, their colors soft and warm under the Mediterranean sun. The harbor was still crowded with yachts that gleamed like polished jewels, reflecting the light off the water’s surface. It was all exactly as I remembered—beautiful in the kind of way that made you feel small and insignificant.

I wasn’t sure what I expected. Maybe cracks in the pristine perfection, signs that time had weathered the place the same way it had weathered me. But Monaco, ever the picture perfect place, refused to bend to time.

And for the first time in years, I didn’t resent it for that. The beauty I had once thought insincere now felt strangely comforting, like being greeted by an old friend who hadn’t forgotten you, even if you had drifted apart.

“Here we are, mademoiselle,” the taxi driver said, pulling up to the paddock entrance.

I took a deep breath and stepped out. The familiar hum of Grand Prix weekend surrounded me immediately - the roar of engines revving in the distance, the buzz of chatter from fans and team members, the faint tang of fuel in the air. It was overwhelming, yes, but also exhilarating. Nostalgia wrapped around me, equal parts warm and suffocating.

“Y/N!” Arthur’s voice rang out, pulling me back to the present. He was waiting just inside the paddock entrance, a wide grin spreading across his face as he waved me over.

I smiled despite myself and walked toward him. “Arthur,” I said, my tone teasing. “You’re not old enough to be drinking espresso yet.”

He laughed, pulling me into a hug that was warmer than I expected. “Eight years and you still won’t give me a break. Come on, let’s go.”

“Go where?” I asked as he led me into the paddock, his enthusiasm practically radiating off him.

“Everywhere,” he said simply. “It’s been years. You’ve missed so much.”

Arthur guided me through the maze of the paddock, pointing out everything with a mix of pride and excitement, as though I hadn’t grown up watching all of this unfold. But I let him have his moment, nodding along and laughing at his commentary.

“You look different,” he said suddenly, catching me off guard. “In a good way, I mean. More… I don’t know, serious. Like you’ve seen things. Learned things.”

I raised an eyebrow. “That’s a very poetic way of saying I look old, Arthur.”

“No, really,” he insisted, his expression earnest. “It’s like you’ve grown into yourself.”

The comment was unexpected, but it warmed me. “Thanks,” I said softly. “You’ve grown up too. A little.”

He grinned. “Don’t let Charles hear you say that. He still treats me like a kid.”

At the mention of Charles, my stomach twisted, though I tried to keep my expression neutral. Arthur must have noticed something, because his tone shifted, gentler now. “I know it’s probably weird, being back here,” he said. “But I think it’s good you came. I think… I think Charles will be happy to see you.”

I didn’t have the heart to tell him how wrong I thought he was. Instead, I nodded and let him lead me deeper into the paddock.

…

The paddock was chaos, as always. Media rushing everywhere, team members darting back and forth. But Charles couldn’t focus on any of it.

Because she was here.

He had only seen her for a brief moment, just a glimpse of her stepping out of a taxi and into the paddock. But it was enough to bring back everything; every memory, every laugh, every ache of missing her. She looked exactly like she did before, only prettier.

It had been eight years. Eight years since she left without a goodbye, leaving him to wonder if he had done something wrong, if he had somehow driven her away. And now she was back, as though she had never been gone.

“Arthur,” he muttered, pulling out his phone. His hand shook slightly as he dialed.

His brother answered on the first ring. “Charles? What’s up?”

“What’s up?” Charles hissed, keeping his voice low as he stepped out of the chaos and into a quiet corner. “Arthur, why didn’t you tell me she was coming?”

There was a pause, then a sheepish laugh. “Ah. You’ve seen her already.”

“Yes, I’ve seen her!” Charles snapped, though the anger in his voice was undercut by the nervous energy bubbling beneath. “You should’ve warned me.”

“I didn’t think I needed to,” Arthur said, his tone annoyingly casual. “I thought you’d be happy. It’s been years, Charles. Don’t you want to see her?”

Charles ran a hand through his hair, leaning against the wall. “Of course I want to see her. I just… I don’t know what to say.”

Arthur’s voice softened. “You’ll figure it out. You always did with her.”

…

Arthur had been called away to a meeting, leaving me to wander the place on my own. I found a quiet spot near the Ferrari hospitality area, nursing a coffee and trying to steady the whirlwind of emotions in my chest.

Being back here was surreal, like stepping into a memory I wasn’t sure I wanted to relive. But at the same time, I couldn’t deny the comfort of it - the familiar sounds, the smell of the sea air mixed with fuel, the vibrant energy of race weekend.

I heard footsteps behind me and turned instinctively, my breath catching as I locked eyes with him.

Charles.

He stopped in his tracks, his expression a mix of shock and something I couldn’t place, something that made my chest tighten. For a moment, neither of us moved. The weight of eight years of silence hung in the air between us, heavy and unyielding.

Before I could say anything, he turned abruptly and walked away.

…

The roar of the engines drowned out everything else. I stood on the hospitality terrace, surrounded by fans who were shouting encouragement in a chorus of excitement. The energy was contagious, a reminder of why I had always loved race weekends, even when the rest of Monaco felt stifling.

Arthur had left me to sit with some of his friends, but I didn’t mind being alone. It gave me a chance to take it all in—the track, the sea of red Ferrari merchandise, the sun reflecting off the sleek cars. My eyes kept drifting to one in particular, the red number 16 that seemed to glide through every corner as though the circuit were made for it.

Charles.

I hadn’t seen him since he walked away from me in the paddock earlier. It shouldn’t have surprised me; after all, what could we have possibly said to each other in that moment? But it still stung, the abruptness of it, the way he looked at me like I was a ghost he wasn’t ready to confront.

I shook my head, trying to push the thought away. It didn’t matter. This wasn’t about him. It was about being here, about reconnecting with a part of my life I had left behind.

But as the race unfolded, I couldn’t stop my gaze from following him. Every lap, every overtaking move, every moment of brilliance - it was impossible not to be drawn in. Charles had always been talented, but seeing him now, so focused and in control, was something else entirely. It was breathtaking.

The crowd around me erupted as Charles crossed the finish line, taking the victory in a masterful final lap. People were cheering, waving flags, hugging strangers in celebration. I found myself smiling, caught up in the infectious energy of the moment.

But my smile faltered as I saw him step out of the car. The joy on his face was undeniable, but there was something else—something in the way his eyes scanned the crowd, as though he were looking for someone.

For a split second, I thought he might be looking for me. But then I shook my head, brushing the thought away. Charles had the whole world celebrating him right now. Why would he waste a second of it on someone who had been gone for so long?

Still, as he climbed onto the podium and lifted the trophy, I couldn’t help but feel that same strange pull I had always felt with him. It wasn’t just admiration or pride; it was I only felt with him.

As the celebrations spilled into the paddock, where the Ferrari garage was alive with champagne showers, laughter, I kept my distance, lingering near the back of the crowd as the team surrounded Charles, congratulating him.

Arthur spotted me and made his way over, a grin plastered across his face. “Pretty incredible, huh?” he said, motioning toward the scene.

I nodded. “He’s… he’s amazing,” I said, my voice quieter than I intended.

Arthur gave me a look, something between knowing and sympathetic. “You should come to the afterparty,” he said. “We’re all heading to Rimaldi later. It’ll be fun.”

I hesitated, the thought of being in a room full of people who knew Charles, who had been part of his world all these years, making my stomach twist. “I don’t know…”

“Don’t overthink it,” Arthur said, cutting me off. “It’s just a party. No pressure.”

I forced a smile, but the weight in my chest didn’t ease. “We’ll see,” I said, knowing full well I wasn’t going to go.

***

The party at Rimaldi was everything Charles had come to expect from these celebrations—loud music, overflowing champagne, and a sea of people he barely recognized. The restaurant’s cozy atmosphere had been transformed into a chaotic celebration, with glasses clinking and laughter filling every corner. Fans and acquaintances congratulated him as though they were old friends, slapping him on the back and offering toasts in his honor.

Normally, this was his element. He was good at this—the smiling, the handshakes, the polite small talk that came with being the center of attention. On any other night, he would have been content to let the noise and the crowd carry him, to let it fill the empty spaces he so often ignored. But tonight was different.

Tonight, no matter how many times he raised his glass or laughed along with a joke, he couldn’t shake the gnawing restlessness that had been with him all day. His mind kept drifting, pulled away from the party and back to the one place he couldn’t seem to avoid—her.

She’d looked the same and yet completely different. The years had softened some edges and sharpened others, but it was still her. Y/N, the person who had once been his closest friend, his anchor in a world that often felt overwhelming. He thought he had moved on from wondering why she left, why she cut him off, but seeing her again brought it all back in a rush.

He barely touched his drink, the glass sweating in his hand as he leaned against the edge of the bar. Across the room, Arthur caught his eye, a knowing grin on his face as he raised his own drink in a silent toast. Charles frowned and turned away, pretending not to notice.

“Charles! Congratulations!” A voice pulled him back to the moment. A well-dressed man, someone he vaguely recognized as a sponsor, clapped him on the shoulder. Charles offered a tight smile, exchanging a few polite words before excusing himself.

The truth was, he wasn’t really here. Not mentally. The louder the party grew, the more it grated on him, every laugh and cheer feeling like static in his ears. His thoughts kept circling back to the paddock, to the way her eyes had met his for that brief, electric moment. She had looked surprised, hesitant, but not angry. That was something, at least.

But then she had disappeared, and he hadn’t been able to stop replaying it in his mind—the way she stood there, so poised and composed, and then was gone, swallowed up by the crowd.

By midnight, he couldn’t take it anymore. The laughter and music blurred into background noise as he stood, shaking his head at someone offering him another drink. He muttered something about needing rest and slipped out through the side door, ignoring Arthur’s raised eyebrows as he left. His brother didn’t stop him, though, and Charles suspected Arthur knew exactly where he was going.

The streets of Monaco were quieter now, the city’s energy winding down after the race. Charles drove aimlessly at first, his hands tight around the steering wheel. The roads he knew so well blurred together as his thoughts raced faster than his car ever could.

He didn’t know what he was going to say. He didn’t even know if she would want to see him. But none of that mattered, because the one thing he did know, the one thought that consumed him, was this:

He needed to see her.

***

The knock at the door startled me.

I glanced at the clock on the bedside table—12:27 a.m. I had been lying on the hotel bed for the past hour, staring at the ceiling, trying to make sense of the day. Arthur’s invitation, the race, seeing Charles for the first time in years—all of it felt like too much, like I had stepped back into a world I didn’t belong to anymore.

Another knock, firmer this time.

I sat up, my heart racing. Maybe it was Arthur, coming to drag me to the afterparty. Or worse, maybe it was a staff member telling me something had gone wrong with my reservation. My stomach twisted as I padded across the room, hesitating before unlocking the door.

But when I opened it, it wasn’t Arthur or hotel staff standing there.

It was Charles.

He leaned against the doorframe, his hands stuffed into his jacket pockets, his hair slightly tousled by the wind. He was dressed casually—dark jeans, a fitted jacket that hinted at his frame—but there was nothing casual about the look in his eyes. They flickered between me and the floor, restless, as though he were trying to piece together why he was even here.

“Hi,” he said finally, his voice quiet but steady.

I stared at him, too stunned to respond at first. “Charles,” I managed after a moment. “What are you doing here?”

His shoulders dropped slightly, like he’d been holding his breath. “Can we go for a drive?”

I blinked, caught off guard. “Now?”

“Yes,” he said, his tone firmer this time, though not unkind. “I need to talk to you. And I can’t do it here.”

I hesitated, glancing back into the room like it held the answer. But there was no answer waiting for me, no excuse strong enough to keep me from following him. “Okay,” I said softly. “Let me grab my coat.”

The streets of Monaco were quieter now, the city winding down after the race. Charles drove with one hand on the wheel, the other resting loosely on the gearstick. His jaw was tight, his eyes fixed on the road, and the silence between us felt heavy, charged with everything unsaid.

I kept stealing glances at him, trying to read the expression on his face, but it was unreadable. It wasn’t anger exactly, but it wasn’t calm either. It was something in between—a tension I couldn’t quite place.

Finally, he turned onto a small road overlooking the harbor and parked. He shut off the engine but didn’t move, his hands gripping the steering wheel as he stared out at the lights reflecting on the water.

“Why did you leave?” he asked finally, his voice breaking the silence like a crack of thunder.

I swallowed hard, my hands twisting in my lap. “I didn’t know how to stay,” I said quietly. “Monaco… it wasn’t the same for me as it was for you. It felt fake, like I was living in a place where everything was about appearances and nothing was real. I couldn’t breathe there.”

He turned then, his gaze sharp and searching. “So you left without a word? Without even telling me?”

I met his eyes, feeling the sting of his words. “I didn’t think you’d understand.”

“Understand?” he repeated, his voice rising slightly. “Y/N, you were my best friend. I would have done anything for you, but you didn’t even give me the chance.”

The anger in his tone cut deep, but beneath it, I could hear something else—hurt. And that was worse.

“I didn’t mean to hurt you,” I said softly. “But I had to go. For me.”

Charles shook his head, running a hand through his hair in frustration. “Do you know how many times I thought about calling you? About flying to London to find you? But I didn’t, because I told myself that if you wanted to talk to me, you would.”

I clenched my hands together, forcing myself to hold his gaze. “I thought about telling you,” I said softly. “But I was scared. Scared that if I saw you, I wouldn’t be able to leave. And I had to leave, Charles. I didn’t know who I was anymore.”

“I would have let you go if that is what you wanted. I just wish I had known.” He said, looking deep into my eyes.

I felt a lump rise in my throat. “It wasn’t that simple.”

“Even a text or a quick call would have made the difference, Y/N.”

“Then why didn’t you?” I asked, the words tumbling out before I could stop them. “You blame me for no contact, but you never reached out either.”

His jaw tightened, his hands gripping the steering wheel again. “Because I didn’t think you wanted me to,” he said finally, his voice quieter now. “You didn’t leave a door open, Y/N. Not for me, not for anyone.”

The anger in his tone cut deep, but beneath it, I could hear something else—hurt. And that was worse.

We fell into silence, the weight of our words hanging heavy in the air. My chest felt tight, my emotions raw and unsteady. I looked out at the harbor, the city lights shimmering like distant stars, and took a deep breath.

“Explain it to me,” he said, his voice quieter now, almost pleading. “Because I don’t understand, Y/N. I’ve spent eight years not understanding.”

My chest felt tight, the weight of everything we had been avoiding pressing down on me.

“I was scared,” I admitted, my voice trembling. “Scared that if I stayed, I’d lose myself. Scared that if I saw you again, I’d lose the courage to leave. And then… after your dad…” I trailed off, the memory too painful to finish. “I didn’t know how to come back after that.”

Charles’s expression softened, the anger fading into something more vulnerable. “You could have come to me,” he said quietly. “You should have come to me.”

I shook my head, tears pricking the corners of my eyes. “And what would I have said? ‘Sorry for leaving you when you needed me the most’? I couldn’t face that, Charles. I couldn’t face you.”

For a moment, neither of us spoke. The only sound was the faint hum of the city outside.

My chest felt tight, my emotions raw and unsteady, as though years of bottled-up feelings had burst open all at once, leaving me vulnerable and exposed. I turned my gaze toward the harbor, the city lights shimmering like scattered stars on the water, their soft glow blurring slightly as tears pricked at my eyes. The stillness of the moment contrasted sharply with the storm raging inside me.

Charles broke the silence, his voice soft but resolute, as though he’d been holding these words back for far too long. “It shouldn’t have been Arthur who invited you back,” he said, his tone laced with frustration and regret. “It should’ve been me. I should’ve been the one to call you.”

The honesty in his voice hit me like a blow to the chest. I turned to him, my breath hitching as his words sank in. The years apart had been a chasm between us, filled with missed chances and unspoken words, and hearing him acknowledge it felt like a bittersweet relief. My throat tightened, and I struggled to find my voice.

“I know,” I said finally, my voice trembling. “But you didn’t call me. And… neither did I call you. We both let it happen.”

Charles’s jaw tightened, and he looked away briefly, his profile illuminated by the faint glow of the streetlights outside. When he spoke again, his voice was quieter, almost fragile. “I didn’t know how to. After you left, I was confused. I didn’t want to admit how much it hurt. And then it just… felt easier to pretend I didn’t care.”

I let out a shaky breath, the tears I’d been holding back finally slipping free. “The second I got back to Monaco, all I did was look for you,” I admitted, my words coming out in a rush, like I had been holding them in for years. “Everywhere I went, I looked for you. You were everywhere - your face in the streets, your name in conversations, your memory in everything I saw. And yet… you were nowhere.”

I heard Charles inhale sharply, and when I turned back, his eyes were locked on mine, filled with an intensity that made my breath catch. Green and piercing, they were searching for something, some part of me I wasn’t sure I still had to give. Vulnerability. Hope. Regret. I saw all of it reflected in his gaze, and it was almost too much.

“I didn’t know if I wanted to see you again,” he admitted, his voice barely above a whisper. “I didn’t know if I could. But now that you’re here…” He shook his head, his expression softening into something raw and earnest. “Now that you’re here, I can’t imagine letting you go again.”

The space between us seemed to disappear in an instant. Charles reached out, his hand trembling slightly as he cupped my face, his thumb brushing against my cheek in a way that was both tender and desperate. His touch was hesitant at first, as though he was afraid I might pull away. But I didn’t. I couldn’t.

Then, before I could say anything, his lips met mine.

The kiss was soft at first, tentative, like we were both testing the waters of something so fragile it might shatter under the weight of our emotions. But it deepened quickly, carrying years of longing, frustration, and unspoken love. It was messy and imperfect, tears mingling with laughter, but it felt like home in a way I hadn’t felt in years.

When we finally pulled apart, Charles didn’t move far. His forehead rested against mine, his breath warm against my skin. He closed his eyes for a moment, as though grounding himself in the closeness between us, before murmuring, “I don’t want to lose you again. Not ever.”

My heart pounded, each beat echoing the promise in his words. I closed my eyes, letting the moment wash over me, before whispering back, “You won’t.”

In that moment, the weight of the past seemed to lift, leaving something lighter in its place. We weren’t perfect, and neither was this, but it was enough. It was us.

#f1 x reader #f1 fanfic #f1 one shot #charles leclerc x you #charles leclerc x reader #charles leclerc one shot #charles leclerc #charles leclerc fanfic #cl16 x reader #cl16 one shot

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berrybore · 3 days ago

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I 100% agree that canon Sally made choices against Percy’s best interest at times but I don’t necessarily think Gabe was one of them.

Let me explain, we do know that Sally knew about Poseidon and camp, there’s a very really possibility that she also knew about the prophecy to an extent. As in, she must have known her son would be in a crazy amount of danger just for being born. We know from the text that Poseidon waited until the last moment he could before claiming Percy, until his powers essentially revealed to the whole camp who he was. That’s how dangerous it was for him to be found out.

I really don’t think Percy should have been raised at camp, that fact that he had a well-meaning, loving mother is one of the biggest things that set him apart from Luke.

I do think she should have sent him to camp earlier than she did but not years earlier like maybe you were suggesting. I also agree that it was an inherently selfish decision to keep him close. She certainly didn’t do him any favors by sending him away to boarding school after boarding school where he was always the new kid, always harassed, and even physically punished by the teachers in one of them (staff of Hermes).

She was in an impossible situation and she made choices purely out of survival not stability or safety cause they had neither. But this way he wouldn’t be outright killed. But Percy is a child and he needs both, so he grows up with low self esteem, neglected, abused emotionally and physically, and without a single friend in the world with how often he changes schools. He can’t talk to his mother either because she’s a little in denial and when Percy asks hard questions she gets emotional, and he feels guilty when he upsets his mom so he stops asking altogether.

(I do believe that she went into the relationship with Gabe with her eyes open and maybe that made it harder for her to admit to herself that she was stuck, that the man she was sure she could face down near damn swallowed her whole, because she chose this, of course in her mind she was still in control but I digress. )

I think as soon as Grover and Chiron were in the picture she should have told him. Instead she told Grover not to do anything. There was a fury at the school, he was found out and attacked, why was he still there for an entire semester after the incident?

We know they didn’t tell her about the fury because we know she didn’t know. Chiron mishandled that big time because it was at that point that it became evident that whatever scent Gabe was hiding wasn’t working. Him following her wishes to the point of keeping Percy at school after an attack from a kindly one without even informing his mother of what happened is actually crazy. Hades found him and sent him a fury to his school. Right under chirons nose. Percy was serving detention with her late into the night sometimes. They should have called Sally and taken Percy to camp together. Instead he was gaslit by everyone to the point of questioning his sanity. Ran away form Grover when they met the fates and Grover still refused to say a word. Didn’t say anything to his mom because why would he at this point, who would even believe him?. Not to mention the very traumatic introduction to the demigod life by watching his mother die right in front of him.

I just think about all the individual choices that Sally, Grover, and Chiron made that led to that night on half blood hill and I think how much it didn’t need to happen.

All three of them failed him.

Sally Jackson choice safety over stability in terms of how she'd take care of her child. Both her and Percy faced years abuse by the hands of one man. Does this make her a good mother who was in over her head or an unprepared one making an impulsive decision?

You found the one hot take even I haven’t dared say aloud yet, because I think it may just be my most unpopular opinion in this fandom. One thing everyone in this fandom seems to agree on is the “universal truth” that Sally Jackson is the best mother in the history of fictional mothers. So, here’s my hot take:

Sally Jackson is not that perfect mother the fandom pretends she is.

Sally during the series? Presented as a loving and good mother. But to get to that point? Pre-series Sally is not written as a good mom; she’s written as a plot-device with the things the author needs to happen in mind and not the motivation of a good mother who prioritizes her child’s happiness and safety in mind.

And I’ll back that claim up with three ways in which Sally has failed Percy as a mother. Not just once, but repeatedly, for years.

But before we get into that, I’d like to switch what you said first. Sally Jackson chose stability over safety. Sally chose the stability of keeping her child at her side over said child’s safety. She made an inherently selfish decision that was not with her child’s best interest and overall safety in mind.

Now, the first - and most obvious one - is Smelly Gabe.

And before I can elaborate on that, I need to clarify one very important thing here, before anyone goes “don’t blame the victim!” on me: Sally Jackson is not a victim; she’s a fictional character. Fictional characters can be written as victims, but they are not autonomous people who make their own choices; their choices are very deliberately made by their author for them. And I want to look at the choices that went into writing her this way, writing her story this way.

Real abuse victims get stuck in abusive relationships for a variety of reasons and they don’t get out of them for equally various reasons. Most of the time, it’s something like “he was so sweet and kind at first, but by the time he showed his real face, it was too late” (and, as a note to that; Percy describes Gabe as having been nice to them for a total of thirty seconds before showing his real face. Now while that is, of course, and exaggeration, it still goes to say that Gabe was pretty much upfront about what kind of person he was).

I’ve never heard one start with “he was the most disgusting, grossest man I could possibly find”. Sally Jackson chose this man. Not just in the way one picks a partner. She went out there and chose the stinkiest, grossest man.

It was a deliberate choice on Riordan’s part to have Sally choose an abusive relationship over sending her son away for his own safety. And this decision did not keep Percy safe; Percy Jackson was abused in his own home, by a horribly stinking man, for six years of his life. That’s not keeping your child safe.

The choice was not made to keep Percy safe; the choice was made to keep Percy with Sally. It was inherently selfishly motivated; she didn’t want to send him away, she wanted to keep him with her.

Sally loves Percy, she loves him dearly and fiercely, I’m not arguing that. But that love led to her not wanting to let go of him. And sometimes, parenting means making tough choices, sometimes loving someone means you have to make a tough decision.

In this case, the “tough decision” is presented as Sally bravely putting up with six years of abuse at Gabe’s hand. That’s the narrative chosen by the author.

But the actual “tough decision” would have been to send Percy to Camp Half-Blood, where he would have been safe. That’s the tough choice a mother would have had to make to keep her child safe.

That’s the tough choice the parents of most of the year-rounders have made. Mister Beauregard sent his daughter all the way from Paris to New York to give her this safety. The distance alone guaranteeing he wouldn’t see her for years potentially - because flying between New York and Paris is not necessarily easily affordable for everyone. Sally’s option was to send Percy to a camp that’s literally one and a half hours away. She could have still seen him, he could have easily visited her.

But her solution was to mask Percy’s scent by marrying a stinking, gross, abusive man.

Let me just stretch once more: Sally’s choice did not keep Percy safe. Sally’s choice made their home unsafe. It brought the danger and pain into their home. It may have moderately protected Percy from monsters - until The Lightning Thief kicked in - but it did not keep Percy actually safe, because it put him into a different kind of danger and through a different kind of pain.

For six years. And, this is where the “not a real person but a fictional character” thing comes up again, because this isn’t a woman where one choice leads to a date with a man which leads to a relationship which leads to abuse that she doesn’t know how to get out of anymore. She is a fictional character whose journey was set out to end with her being in an abusive relationship.

And we also don’t know why she didn’t get out of it. She’s not a real person, we don’t know if she was so scared of Gabe that she didn’t know how to leave, if her lack of a support system is what led to her not leaving him, or if it was the motivation of not giving up Percy. The real, actual reason is that Riordan wanted to keep her in there and keep Percy out of the loop until he was twelve and The Lightning Thief could happen. Because she was able of getting rid of him as soon as the truth unravelled and Percy met camp.

And I’d like to use the way she did that to drive back home just how bad Gabe was, just how bad the situation Sally and Percy were in for six years, really was.

She murders him. She flat-out murders him. Both, her and Percy, together. This twelve-year old child who we meet and get to know as kind and not... not a murder-child, is ready to kill a man. That’s how badly Gabe abused them; both of these kind people chose murder to get rid of him.

And it’s just something I’ve never gotten over. Riordan really made the decision that his protagonist’s mom would rather get them both into an abusive home than give Percy up to camp. That was his decision; there could have been other ways. One thing that would have made this seem less like a deliberate choice would have, for example, been Sally not knowing about camp.

If she was a desperate mother, who saw no other options? That’d have made the situation different too. But we know Sally knew about camp. She knew there was a place she could send her son where he would be safe from the monsters, but she decided against that, she decided that she wanted to keep him close, at any costs - and the cost was six years of abuse.

I do not think that this decision should be framed as a heroic sacrifice, because the fact that she knew of an actually safe solution and decided against it was inherently selfish. She did not put up with six years of abuse for selfless reasons because there was “no other way”; there was, she knew that, but the author didn’t want her to take that.

Sometimes, the sacrifice is letting go of your child. And, as mentioned before, she wouldn’t have let go of him for good - camp is in the same bloody city as she is living. Literally one and a half hours away from her.

Now on to the other two ways in which I think Sally Jackson failed Percy.

For one, the lies about his father. Now, real people who are left by their partner with a baby, they can pick whatever to tell their kids whenever. But, again, this is a fictional character and the author makes the decision for her. And this, again, was a decision made solely based on the end result; Riordan needed Percy to not be in the know by the time The Lightning Thief came around, even though from a character-perspective, telling Percy the truth earlier would have been the logical and right decision.

If your kid is a demigod who is attracting real actual monsters with his scent alone? Percy started really attracting monsters when he was six years old and for the next six years, Sally didn’t disclose the truth to him; not about monsters, not about his father, not about the fact that Percy may have powers.

Percy attracted so many monsters that it led to Sally getting married to Gabe. That’s how badly he attracted monsters. Which also implies that Percy must have seen monsters. We get to see in The Lightning Thief just how much Percy thinks he’s going crazy with the things he sees. And that’s been going on for six years too - six years and in those, his scent only got stronger.

This, again, isn’t just one decision she made. This is a decision she made every single day over and over again. The decision not to tell Percy about his father, the powers, the simple reassurance that he’s not going insane, that monsters are real. This was Percy’s reality and it would obviously only become more and more of an issue the older Percy got, but every single day, she chose not to tell him, to let him believe not just a lie but also steadily that he was going crazy.

And it’d have gone a long way if he had just known. Even with Gabe in their life, even if she hadn’t made the choice to send him to camp at age six, it’d have helped him so much to know the truth and be prepared for this life.

Because this wasn’t just an issue of “the guy left me, I don’t want to talk about it with my kid”, this was inherently about, once more, Percy’s safety. Knowing what to watch out for, knowing the thing you should watch out for is actually real, are huge factors in Percy’s safety. Having him as well-prepared as possible.

She knew his father was Poseidon. It’s not even that she had sex with some dude, not knowing who he was. She knew he was Poseidon. She knew what Percy’s parentage was, she must have observed the slow development of Percy’s powers over the years.

But again, she chose to leave him in the dark about it. He could have been well-prepared by age twelve. Read up everything on Poseidon, experimented with potential powers he may have, understanding why the fishes in the aquarium are talking to him and that he is not actually hearing voices, learning.

But that’s not useful for the author; Riordan wants an unprepared Percy who can be used to introduce this world to the reader.

The choice to not tell Percy the truth about his father and about being a demigod was made deliberately and, again, not in Percy’s best interest. And in this case, there really is no other interpretation left aside from “the author needs it to happen this way” - with Gabe, there is the legitimate argument that she may have been at one point just an abused woman stuck in a relationship with no out because we don’t know enough to know what her motivation and situation were exactly - but there is... no benefit at all in lying to Percy about this, no reason for it.

The moment he first started being in actual life-threatening danger because monsters came after him, it became a pressing matter to tell him what monsters are, that they are real and why they are after him and to prepare him for it.

Which brings me to the third instance.

She never prepared him - even just in a mortal manner. Even if we let the first two - the marriage to Gabe and the lies about his father - stand as they are, Sally could have done something very simple to prepare Percy for his life and to help keeping him safe.

Self-defense classes. Judo. Martial arts. Sword-fighting classes. Whatever.

Many parents teach their kids these kind of things from a young age. Parents whose kids aren’t in constant danger of being attacked by monsters. One of your first parental instincts should be to teach your kid to be safe; to protect themselves. Give him the means to fight back.

So, that’s it. That’s the three very vital and important instances in which I think Sally failed Percy as a mother; not just once, but repeatedly, for years.

Instead of sending him to a safe place where he could learn about his heritage and learn control of his powers as well as learning how to fight the monsters after his life, she chose to marry an abusive, smelly man whose scent would mask Percy’s. Probably. Hopefully. But it didn’t really, not all the time. As shown by The Lightning Thief and monsters coming after Percy. And Percy starts to think he’s crazy, because at no point did she tell him about the monsters, and at no point does he really know how to fight for his life, because at no point did she put the means to defend himself into his hands.

No. No, I do not think that those are the decisions a good mother would make. Those are decisions the author made because he knew the starting point of his story and he knew where Percy’s character needed to be for that.

The thing that’s glossed over are the choices Riordan implicitly made Sally make. To get to this point for Percy, at age 12, he had to make Sally repeatedly act against Percy’s best interests and deliberately not tell Percy the truth or teach him way to stay safe. So he masks those choices by putting on a framework that’s meant to make you only look at her suffering and the outcome, not the choices that led to it. That was Riordan’s choice and he framed it in a way that the fandom ate up and celebrates, when... neither Sally, nor Riordan, had do to that. There was another option on the table and, if Riordan had sat down and thought hard, I’m pretty sure there would have been more options.

The bottom line, what Sally’s parenting comes down to in the end, is that she and Percy got stuck with an abusive man for six years, because she didn’t want to send him to an actual safe place, she spent six years essentially gaslighting Percy about the things he hears/sees by not telling him the monsters are actually real and she repeatedly left him in unnecessary danger by not giving him the means to defend himself in any way whatsoever. And those are not signs of good parenting, not in my book.

But it’s just so much easier to ignore all of that and pretend that blue candy and trips to Montauk are the end all be all and that Sally’s fierce love for her son is the most defining trait of parenting. I know that. Most of the time, I’m right there with you - I love fanon!Sally, I love to pretend she’s the best mom ever and never did anything wrong, because I know the decisions are inherently made by Riordan and are a by-product; I know he wants her to be a good mother, I know throughout the series, he writes her as a good and loving mother.

But if I have to be honest and if I look at the whole text, including the implications of their past, canon!Sally isn’t that good of a mother.

#I also think a part of it is Percy absolutely refusing to blame her for anything cause she’s all he has #and he doesn’t want to unpack some of the damage that she caused #because then he’ll have to come to terms with the fact that his mom made choices that knowingly hurt him regardless of the situation #this could have been a great arc about kids idolizing their parents and coming to terms with the fact that their human too #but ahh that implies that riordan is capable of complex storylines #sally jackson #Percy Jackson #tlt #pjo

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dailyd0ses · 3 days ago

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A Rose Without Thorns Pt. 2

Mama Rose from Gypsy on Broadway x Female Reader

The night stretched on, but for the first time in what felt like years, Rose slept.

It wasn’t a deep sleep—she tossed and turned, mumbling in her dreams, fingers twitching as if she were still conducting some unseen orchestra—but it was sleep nonetheless. And in the quiet hours before dawn, when the city outside your window softened into a gentle hum, you found yourself lying awake, thinking about the woman now resting under your roof.

Rose Hovick. The infamous stage mother, the woman who built stars and burned bridges, who had spent her life chasing dreams that never truly belonged to her. The same woman who, just hours ago, had been sitting on a cold bench with nowhere to go.

She was a force of nature. But even storms had to settle eventually.

By morning, the scent of fresh coffee filled the apartment. You were already up, seated at the small kitchen table, flipping idly through a newspaper when you heard the shuffle of footsteps.

"Smells good," Rose muttered, voice rough with sleep.

You glanced up to see her standing in the doorway, draped in her fur coat over the same dress from last night, though now slightly wrinkled. Her hair was tousled, but not in a careless way—it softened her somehow, made her look less like Madame Rose and more like just Rose.

"Hope you take it strong," you said, pushing a mug toward her.

She let out a tired chuckle as she sat across from you. "Darling, after the life I’ve had? The stronger, the better."

She took a sip and sighed, her whole body seeming to deflate just a little.

For a while, there was only the quiet sound of coffee cups clinking against saucers.

Then, finally, she spoke.

"So, what’s your story?"

You raised an eyebrow. "My story?"

"You took me in last night like it was nothing," she said, studying you over the rim of her mug. "Either you’re a saint, or you’ve got your own ghosts keeping you up at night."

You smirked. "Maybe both."

Rose hummed, as if she weren’t entirely convinced, but she let it go.

Instead, she leaned back, tapping her fingers against the side of her mug. "I don’t know what the hell I’m doing," she admitted.

"With what?"

She gestured vaguely. "With this."

You tilted your head. "With staying here?"

"With..." She hesitated, searching for the words. "With letting someone help me. With letting myself stop for once."

That caught your attention.

"You’ve never stopped before, have you?" you asked gently.

She gave a short, humorless laugh. "Not once."

You studied her for a moment, then leaned forward slightly. "Maybe it’s time you did."

She scoffed. "And do what, exactly?"

You shrugged. "Figure out what you want. Not for June. Not for Louise. Not for show business. Just you."

Rose fell silent at that, her fingers tightening slightly around her cup.

It was a terrifying thought, wasn’t it? She had spent her whole life chasing dreams on behalf of others. What was left when there was no one left to chase for?

Finally, she exhaled, shaking her head. "You really are something, you know that?"

You grinned. "So I’ve been told."

A small smile tugged at the corner of her lips, but there was something else in her eyes now. A quiet curiosity. A shift.

"You could stay," you offered before you could stop yourself. "At least for a little while. Until you figure things out."

Rose arched an eyebrow. "Are you always this generous with broken women?"

"Only the interesting ones."

She let out a low chuckle, shaking her head. "You’re dangerous, kid."

You smirked. "Not half as dangerous as you."

For a long moment, she just looked at you, something unreadable flickering across her expression. And then, ever so slightly, she nodded.

"Alright," she murmured. "I’ll stay."

Rose stayed.

At first, it was temporary. A few days, she told herself. Maybe a week, just until she figured out her next step. But days turned into weeks, and weeks stretched into something that neither of you bothered to name.

She made herself at home in small ways. Leaving her fur coat draped over the back of your couch. Setting her coffee cup in the sink but never actually washing it. Fixing the placement of your picture frames with an absentminded precision, as if she were arranging props for a show.

She still carried the weight of years spent fighting, pushing, demanding—but in your space, she started to ease, bit by bit.

One night, you found her in the kitchen, sleeves rolled up, scrubbing a dish with the same intensity as if she were directing an orchestra.

"You don’t have to do that, you know," you said, leaning against the doorway.

She scoffed. "What, you think I don’t know how to do dishes?"

"I think you’ve spent too many years having other people do them for you."

She smirked. "Well, maybe I’m finally learning to fend for myself."

"That’s assuming I kick you out," you teased.

Rose turned her head slightly, giving you a long, unreadable look. Then, to your surprise, she sighed and muttered, "You’d be a fool to keep me around, you know."

"Why’s that?"

"I ruin everything I touch." She rinsed the dish a little too forcefully, the water splashing over the sink. "Everyone leaves. Even when I give ‘em the world, they still go."

"You didn’t give them the world, Rose," you said gently. "You gave them a dream. There’s a difference."

She stiffened.

For a moment, you thought you’d pushed too far. But then, she let out a breath and shut off the sink.

"You’re a smart one, aren’t you?" she muttered.

You smiled. "So I’ve been told."

She grabbed a towel, drying her hands with slow, thoughtful movements. Then, she turned to face you fully, leaning against the counter.

"You never told me why you took me in that night," she said.

You shrugged. "Because you looked like you needed it."

"That’s it?"

"That’s it."

She studied you, her sharp gaze searching, as if trying to decipher a script that hadn’t been written yet.

"You know, I’ve never—" She stopped herself, clicking her tongue. "Ah, never mind."

You tilted your head. "Never what?"

She hesitated.

Then, with an almost defiant lift of her chin, she said, "Never been looked at the way you look at me."

The words settled in the air between you, delicate and dangerous all at once.

You swallowed, holding her gaze. "And how do I look at you?"

Rose exhaled sharply, like she couldn’t believe she was even having this conversation. "Like I’m more than just the mess I’ve made."

You took a step closer. Not too close—just enough to let her know you were listening. That you saw her.

"You are more than that," you said softly.

She didn’t look away.

For once, Rose—who had spent her whole life running, chasing, fighting—didn’t retreat.

Instead, she nodded. Just slightly. Just enough.

And for the first time in a long, long time, she allowed herself to believe it.

#mama rose #patti lupone #fics

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heaven4lostgirls · 3 days ago

Text

prompt: swim || @moonwater-microfic || word count: 598

✿ ✿ ✿ ✿ ✿ ✿ ✿ ✿ ✿ ✿ ✿ ✿ ✿ ✿ ✿ ✿ ✿ ✿ ✿ ✿

“you’re going to have to get in at some point” remus points out as he wades through the shallow waves that bump softly against his hips.

regulus stands on the dry shore of the lake, clad in short black swim trunks that have remus thinking of the many sinful things he could be doing to his lovely boyfriend instead of this.

“i don’t want to” regulus says, crossing his arms.

remus trails his eyes from the basically nonexistent shorts, up pale skin towards regulus’ stormy gaze.

“well you don’t have a choice, you’re going to have to learn to swim one way or another” remus says with what he hopes is a comforting smile.

he’s been trying to get regulus into the water for the past half hour, hoping to teach the younger boy to swim before their end of year vacation to the coast.

james and sirius had planned it, and whilst they were aware that sirius did not know how to swim, he usually preferred tanning (read: burning) on the shore.

whilst regulus stayed awfully quiet about his lack of skill within bodies of water, thus bringing them to their current predicament.

remus refuses to let regulus go on the trip without at least teaching him to float.

regulus however, is as stubborn as they come and refuses help.

“i’m not letting you get in that car next week unless you get into the water love” remus calls back and he watches as regulus’ expression settles into a scathing glare.

remus would have been worried if he didn’t know regulus as well as he knew the back of his hand.

he knows he’s scared, terrified for a reason that remus can’t seem to fathom.

“i’m coming out” remus says and he watches as regulus’ form tenses as remus wades back in to make the short walk towards the smaller boy.

“don’t make me” regulus whispers as remus comes to a stop in front of the younger boy.

“i would never” remus quickly promises, “but you do know i won’t apologize for caring , i’m not letting you go to the coast where your idiot of a brother will dare you to get into the water when you don’t know how to swim” remus says sternly.

“you’d save me though!” regulus says petulantly and remus huffs a sigh.

“that’s not the point, and you know it” he argues and regulus’ form goes slack all at once as he leans against the scarred boy.

“i’m scared of drowning” he mumbles into remus’ chest as the sandy-haired boy wraps his arms around pale skin, thoughtfully rubbing calming circles onto sun warmed skin.

“nothing is going to happen to you as long as i’m there” remus whispers back as he places a small kiss onto regulus’ temple.

regulus only hums, “i have dreams…of drowning.”

remus frowns, “you mean your nightmares?”

he feels dark curls tickle his chest as regulus nods without saying anything.

“we don’t have to do this today, we can still go to the coast, as long as you promise you won’t let your stubbornness put your safety at risk” remus says, achingly affectionate as he tugs regulus’ face out of his chest.

regulus scrunches his nose, “no, it’s nice outside. i just wanted you to know i wasn’t trying to be a brat”

remus’ lips tip up to the side, “you’re always a brat, i just know you better than you think i do”

they share a small smile as regulus lets remus lead him slowly towards the edge of the shoreline.

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joonjuul · 8 hours ago

Text

choked on smoke. jjk

pairing: exboyf!jk x reader

wc: 3.2k

warnings: exboyfriend!jk, softdom!jk, kindasubby!jk, jk is a switch??, bro is yearningggg, lots and lots of angst, reader is slightly depressed, breakup mentions, choking, light mouth play, lots and lots of cigarettes, crying mentioned (non sexual), pet names, slight impreg kink, unprotected sex (wrap it up), slight creampie mentions, more pwp don’t hate me

a/n: this was a lot of fun to write. it’s like all my favorite things in one: desperate jungkook, cigarettes, and angst. reqs open!!

╋━

you still remember how it felt. so close to him yet so far. the way your heart thumped in your chest, your cheeks hot with tears, mind racing, palms sweaty. you remembered it almost like it was yesterday. the way he looked into your eyes deeply, before breaking you in ways you never knew were possible.

“this isn’t working.”

you could still hear him now if you focused really hard. you could still hear his laugh. feel his skin against yours. the way he used to twirl your hair, or circle patterns along your bare back as you laid beside him. you missed him more than anything, and every time you thought about him it only deepened the wound.

it’s been a month now. a month since you last saw him. last touched him. you feel the cold gust of wind rustle against your clothes as you bring the dainty cigarette butt up to your chapped lips, inhaling slowly before feeling the intoxication fill your lungs. even dressed in your warmest clothes, you still couldn’t escape the icy january wind, or the coldness that consumed your insides from sheer loneliness.

you look down at the cigarette in your hands, watching carefully as the ashes fall to the ground, the wind picking up pieces and allowing them to float off, find another spec of air to pollute. but the thought of you being a smoker now is only nauseating. you only started smoking so you could feel closer to him, so you could experience his scent one last time. it wasn’t a habit you picked up by your own means, just another way for him to poison you for the rest of your life.

you flick the half smoked cigarette off your balcony and turn to face the slider door, entering your now slightly chilled apartment.

everything was dark now, it wasn’t something you could fully explain or put into words, but your life was dark, your apartment was dark, everything about you was dark, and you knew he was the reason why.

you daydream as your feet carry you to the kitchen, eyes dancing over the messy sink, the fridge that was practically empty, and the cupboards that were collecting dust before turning back around and slumping down on your couch.

you weren’t sure what to do these days. it always felt like you were waiting for him to come home, but he never did. you could easily kick your feet up and watch a movie, do something to distract yourself, but you never did. you simply wallowed in the pain and memories of your last moments together, wishing you could’ve done something differently.

your mind drifts as you hear the subtle patter of rain begin outside.

at least it wasn’t snow.

how could he give up on you so easily? after all those years? it was never something you could fully comprehend. how one day he looked at you with his eyes full of love, and the next like you never existed to him, like he never loved you at all. you sometimes entertained the idea that he had found someone knew, something to make you hate him, make him easier to forget instead of having to live with the fact that he simply didn’t love you anymore, but it never worked. he was the most loyal man you knew, even during your hardships. it wouldn’t be fair to him to paint him as the bad guy when in reality, neither of you did anything wrong.

you’re quickly brought back to reality at the sound of a knock at your apartment door. it was almost strange, you never had visitors, in fact you didn’t really have any friends either. it could very well be your mom checking in again, but it was late, and she never liked to walk in the city at night.

before you can finish the thought, you’re in front of the door, your hand on the doorknob as you turn it slightly, the chill of the hallway gently caressing your face as your eyes fall on a very tall, very wet man standing before you.

not just any man.

“jungkook?”

his eyes are bloodshot, his face cold, and his clothes dripping with remnants of the weather outside.

“can i come in?”

his voice felt like your very first cigarette, the way you inhaled it perfectly the day he left you, the way the poison immediately swept through your bloodstream and straight to your head, leaving you dizzy and desperate for more.

you’re unable to garner a response, only able to stand beside your door, allowing him space to brush past you and into your once bright and welcoming home. but somehow, he doesn’t notice how your apartment has changed, and he doesn’t notice how you’ve changed either. how much weight you’ve lost, how you’ve cut your hair at least 3 times, how your undereyes are littered with bags instead of freckles.

you shut the door behind you as you watched him nervously pace throughout your kitchen, eyes dashing between you and the floor. his lips were pouty, like they always were after he cried. why was he here?

“jungkook, what’s going on?”

he stops in his tracks, turning quickly to face you, but never stepping closer, almost as if you’re too fragile for him to be near.

“i fucked up, y/n.”

silence fills the space between you, only the gentle, distant sound of raindrops filling your ears. you want to answer, you want to scream, you want to fall to your knees and beg for him back, but you don’t. instead you stand still, watching him intently as his eyes narrow in on you.

“i fucked up, bad.”

he takes a step closer, watching your reaction carefully, examining your body language. he looks desperate, like his life is filled with anguish, like he’s as broken as you are.

“i quit smoking.” he mutters under his breath. “i knew how much you hated it, so i quit.”

silence.

“i started smoking.”

his gaze shifts at your response, his brows furrowed together in a way that makes your knees weak, a way that makes your body crawl with need.

“why?”

he steps closer again. you watch as his hands go down instinctively to your waist, but stop before he’s able to make contact.

“because they reminded me of you.”

your eyes meet perfectly, dancing between each other as you feel the air between you thicken. the distant rain now turning into something of white noise as your mind zones in on one thing; him. you can see the hurt on his face, but you’re sure he can see the hurt on yours as well.

“why did you leave me?”

it comes out barely over a whisper, and you’re not sure why you said it, but it was a question that had been repeating in your mind for weeks. you thought you knew the answer, but seeing him here in front of you now, you weren’t so sure.

“you really don’t know do you?”

you shake your head no.

“you’re like a flame, y/n.”

he takes another step forward, his hand falling to the side of your face as he cups your skin gently, his touch igniting something within you.

“so beautiful, so warm, but always burning. i’m covered in scars from holding you to close.”

his words cut deep, but for some reason you still can’t understand. he was your world, your love, you never would’ve done anything to hurt him.

“i never asked you to break yourself for me. i just wanted you to stay.” your voice is hushed, breaking the barriers between you as you feel your chest get heavier, like you’re smoking him now, like he’s been the real poison all along.

“you pushed me away long before i left.” he continues to lean in towards you, his touch on your face only deepening the crimson on your cheek.

“you’re the one who gave up.” your voice is raw as you stare up at him, watching as he carefully tucks a hair behind your ear, hie eyes filled with desperation as you now realize how close you are to him.

“do you think i wanted to? you don’t even know how badly i wanted to stay, or how much i still do.” his stare intensifies as his gaze shifts down to your lips. his hand against your cheek is tender, but his face screams urgency as you both linger in the silence for a minute, your breaths mingling as you each wait for the other to respond, or to come closer.

“i still do.” jungkook mutters before tightening his grip on your face gently, pulling you towards him as he engulfs your lips in his. the kiss starts slow, tentative, as if he’s testing the waters. but soon the hunger strikes, mouths turning desperate as the weight of everything left unsaid pours out into each touch, each movement. before you know it your hands are tangled in his hair, your back pressed against the wall as he feverishly moves down your body, his lips finding every patch of skin he missed so deeply while you were gone.

“i never stopped wanting you.” he mutters in between kisses as he dives into the crook of your neck, peppering you with tiny bruises and marks, imprinting you in any way he can.

your movements are in sync, like everything you felt the last few months was mimicked within him, like he was struggling just as much as you were.

his hands quickly find the hem of your pants, pulling them down with intensity as his hands push your hips further into the wall. his strong arms holding you in place as he begins to rut against you, every moment he spent missing you now rolled into a tight coil within his stomach. every bone in his body yearned for you, for your touch, your scent, and he was painfully overwhelmed, his hard on probing you with every needy grind of his hips.

you moan out carelessly, his name seeping from your lips as your hands pull and tug his damp hair, finger nails falling to his back and scratching gently as his shirt, almost instinctually.

“need you.” he whimpers, swiftly picking you up and carrying you across the room, effortlessly tossing you on the couch before he falls on top of you, his crotch zeroing in on yours as his movements build in intensity.

“you made it so damn hard to forget you.” his voice shakes as he leans down into your ear, each word coming out in a desperate gasp as he tangles himself between your legs. your hands quickly fall to the hem of his pants as you tug gently, silently signaling for him to take them off, to which he obliges, removing his shirt as well in the process.

it was like seeing him for the first time, bare in front of you, sweat glistening on his forehead, cheeks flushed. it was more than you could’ve ever asked for, it was worth every cigarette, every tear, every lonely night.

you feel his fingers fall to your panties, pushing them to the side gently as he inspects your cunt feverishly.

“so wet and warm, just how i remembered it.” his breaths are shallow and quick as he strokes your folds gently before carefully aligning his cock at your entrance. his gaze shifts from your bodies up to your face, carefully examining your features, awaiting for your confirmation, but you’re only able to respond by bucking your hips forward with a gentle whine.

you watch as his features soften, the corners of his lips turning up into a gentle smile, a smile of familiarity as he places gentle, reassuring strokes on your thighs, and leaning down to whisper sweet nothings to you as he engulfs your mouth into another hot kiss, pushing his hips up with ease as he stretches you out.

the sting is long and rough, worse than you remembered, and it’s obvious that he’s affected by your tightness, his face falling into the crook of your neck as he whimpers, falling victim to your cunt’s subtle praise.

“god you make me crazy, i just can’t resist you.” his voice is filled with desperation as he bottoms out inside of you, his hands gripping your hips tightly as he struggles to hold himself in place, allowing you the time to adjust.

you moan out at the feeling of his tip nudging against your g-spot, he always fit inside of you so perfectly, but you knew how needy he became when he wasn’t able to move immediately after entering you. one of the subtle sides to his unspoken submission for you.

“please. please let me move.” he begs, each word coming out in a desperate gasp as his hips gentle twitch and flick against you, his body filled with an overwhelming heat.

“go ahead, baby.”

at the sound of your words he immediately falls on a quick but gentle pace. his hips rolling into you perfectly as he watches your face contort with pleasure and desire. he was completely at your mercy, he had never been so desperate to see you cum, the way your face lights up and your eyes roll back into your head. it’s all he’s been able to think about since the day he left, and he wanted nothing more than to bring you to the edge over and over again, until your body has had enough.

“fuck i missed you so much.” he groans out, his body melting into yours completely as he sets on a steady pace, the head of his cock perfectly brushing against your g-spot with every thrust. you can’t control the way your hands lose their place, bouncing from his perfect hair, to leaving crescent shaped marks on his back, to his ink scattered arms.

you’re a moaning mess, his every move perfectly aligning within you, as if your bodies were made for one another. you could feel the intensity in the room shift the moment his eyes laid on yours, staring deep into your soul as he quickly snaps his hips back, your walls constricting at the sudden force, causing a dark chuckle to leave his mouth.

“forgot you liked it rough, baby. forgive me i want to savor this as long as i can. you look so perfect right now.” his voice is dark and raspy as he slows his thrusts, bringing a hand down to slowly circle your clit, the touch sending shivers through your spine as you toss your head back, releasing a guttural moan. he hadn’t touched you in so long, you hadn’t felt him in so long, and the way he was making you feel could only be described as euphoric.

“there you go, baby.” his praises only spur you on more as you bring your hips up to meet his, your bodies moving in perfect synchronicity.

“i’m hopeless, baby. hopelessly yours.”

“keep going, that’s a girl.”

“god i’m addicted you.”

“you’re so beautiful, it’s torture.”

every word, every phrase spilling from his mouth go in one ear and out the other. all you can think about is how perfectly his cock slides in and out of you, the sounds of your wetness mixed with the now distant pattering of rain and his quick breaths all you can hear as you feel a coil build in your stomach. you wanted nothing more than to cum on him, to watch his face twist as your walls tighten around him, to moan his name loud enough for the neighbors to hear. he was yours, and you were his.

jungkook looks down at you, watching as your eyes clench shut, your lack of response only telling him one thing; you were close.

“sweet girl-“ he mutters, pulling his cock out of you and bringing an arm under your back to quickly flip you over, your stomach consumed with the warmth of the bed as he easily slips back inside, his breath hot against your neck. “i’m desperate to see you cum.” his pace quickens, his voice shaky as he begins to fuck into you faster now, watching closely as your constricting hole tugs him back in with each thrust.

your head is spinning, your body on fire, the feeling only intensifying as he reaches forward, gently tapping his fingers on your mouth as you engulf them fully, tasing the sweetness of your slick mixed with his precum. he curls his fingers, flattening them on your tongue as he draws them over your chin landing on your neck to grip it tightly. a finger on either side of your throat carefully cutting off your breathing as you feel your stomach tighten.

“cum for me pretty girl.“ his words linger in the air as you feel yourself get drawn towards the edge, hurtling over it before you have time to think. your legs shake as you feel a wave of bliss wash over you, your mind going blank as you feel your cunt gush around him.

jungkook watches intently, his thrusts becoming messy as he feels you tighten around him, his cock stalling within you as he relishes in the sensation.

“fuck.”

his hips falter as he tries to fall back to his original pace, fighting against your sealed walls.

you moan out loudly, causing him to quickly remove his hand around your neck and place gentle kisses along your back, his touch soothing any pain that may have occurred.

“shhh, it’s okay baby, i’ve got you.” your body doesn’t even process the overstimulation because you’re stuck on a high. you didn’t care that it burned, that it was practically unbearable, because it was all for him.

he brings a hand up to your hair, gripping it tightly as his thrusts deepen and increase in speed. his high not far behind yours as you silently pray for him to stay inside you, for him to coat your walls and tie you down, make you his forever.

“god you drive me insane. you have me wrapped around your finger, baby.” the head of his cock hits places inside you you never knew were reachable as he becomes frantic behind you, his body hot to the touch.

“gonna fill you up, baby. you’re never leaving me again.”

and just like that, you finally feel like your life is filled with a sense of light again. whether it be from the brightness of his cum leaking from your cunt, or from the lighter as he brings it up to your lips, carefully igniting the cigarette placed between them.

your eyes flick at him next to you, a sheet of sweat covering his body as he pulls the lighter away. you inhale deeply as you feel the smoke fill your lungs, but it doesn’t feel bitter this time, in fact, it’s rather peaceful.

you exhale, watching as the smoke fills the air between you as you bring the cigarette between his lips, watching his eyes shut in bliss as he fills his lungs with the same sensation.

“you’re pretty when you smoke.” he says as he breathes out, admiring the way your chest heaves gently.

“i learned from the best.”

#bts smut #bts #jungkook fic #jungkook smut #jungkook x reader #bts jungkook #jungkook au #jungkook imagine #jungkook scenarios #bts scenarios #bts imagines #bts fic #jeon jungkook

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lucy90712 · 3 days ago

Note

CAN U DO A JELOUS KENAN

I smoothed down my dress in the mirror and double check to make sure there was no lipstick on my teeth. I've already checked about a million times but I have to look perfect, tonight I'm going to an award ceremony with Kenan for the first time which is a big deal. We've been together for two years now but we prefer to not be always be seen together in public so our relationship stays pretty private but tonight that changes. Kenan invited me as soon as he found out he was nominated for the golden boy web award but told me I didn't have to go if I didn't want to but I agreed straight away. We may like to have privacy in our relationship but that doesn't mean I don't want to go and support him no matter how much I know I'll hate it and how much anxiety it causes me I will be there.

"You look beautiful love" Kenan said walking in from the bathroom where he was doing his hair

"Thank you you look very handsome too" I said

"No one will be looking at me when you look so amazing in that dress" Kenan half joked

"You're the one who's nominated I'd hope someone looked at you" I said

"Well I'll definitely be looking at only you" he flirted

"Stop being such a flirt" I said

"No can do not when my girlfriend always looks so hot" he smiled

All I could do was shake my head but he still wrapped his arms around my waist and kissed behind my ear. He kept kissing me all over my face anywhere but my lips as I wouldn't let him ruin my lipstick that I spent so long perfecting. Eventually we had to stop as our car was downstairs ready to take us to the venue. Kenan held my hand as we walked out the hotel to we were staying in despite the ceremony being in Turin to the car. The driver went to open the door for us but Kenan stopped him and opened the door for me instead. The whole drive he kept me distracted as I think he could tell that the nerves were really starting to kick in even if I tried not to show it. As soon as we arrived Kenan helped me out of the car and stood in front of me so I could sort my dress out before we were in front of people and cameras.

We walked down the red carpet together and straight away there was cameras flashing blinding me but I had Kenan guiding me to stop me walking into someone or something. We were made to stop and pose properly for pictures which really made me feel uncomfortable as I've never been great in front of a camera but luckily I'm not really the one they are looking at which makes it a little better. Soon they wanted interviews from Kenan which I took as my chance to get out of the spotlight and inside the venue where hopefully there will be less eyes on me.

Just as I got settled in my seat out of the corner of my eye I saw someone walking towards me but I knew it wasn't Kenan. I was right it was some random guy who I didn't know and honestly don't care to know but I think I'm going to have to talk to anyway.

"Hi I'm Tom" the guy introduced himself

"Hey I'm y/n" I replied trying to be polite

"It's a lovely venue right" he said making small talk

"Yeah lovely" I said awkwardly

"I'll leave you be but I'll catch you later" he said

Once the guy has left Kenan came and sat next to me but he said nothing so he must not have seen me have the most awkward interaction of my life. The ceremony started not long after and I forgot about Tom as I watched all the awards be presented. Then it got to the award that Kenan was nominated for and instinctively I grabbed hold of his hand to calm his nerves or mine I'm not really sure which. Then they announced Kenan's name as the winner and to say I was shocked was an understatement. I wanted Kenan to win and I believed in him don't get me wrong but there was so many amazing players nominated I wasn't sure that Kenan would win. Watching him walk up there to accept the award made me so proud to be his girlfriend and have been here to watch him as he's grown as a player. There are so many amazing young players around at the moment that sometimes I feel like Kenan doesn't get enough recognition but now hopefully he'll get the recognition he deserves.

His little speech made me a little emotional but I held it together until he came back to his seat and I had to give him a quick kiss to stop myself from letting a few tears escape my eyes. As the rest of the ceremony went on Kenan showed me his award which was so cool it's going to look great on his shelf with the other trophies he's won. I don't think I paid much attention to the rest of the ceremony as I was just thinking about how proud I am of Kenan.

After the ceremony there was an after party organised for everyone who attended which originally we hadn't planned to go to but I told Kenan we had to go seeing as he won it would be rude not to. What I didn't anticipate was that everyone would want to speak to Kenan so he was very quickly taken away from me as he was moved around groups of people wanting to congratulate him. It didn't really bother me I found somewhere to sit on my own and no one really noticed me which was fine by me as I prefer to not talk to loads of new people all at once. At some point I got a drink given to me but I didn't touch it as I have classes in the morning so I don't want to be hungover at all. Just when I thought I could relax until Kenan was released back to me the guy from earlier decided to sit next to me. He had clearly been drinking so I moved away from him slightly feeling a bit uncomfortable by his presence.

"Hey pretty girl I'm glad to see you're still here" he said leaning towards me again

"Aren't you going to talk to me?" He asked when I didn't respond

"I just want to get to know you tell me about yourself" he added

"There's not much to say" I replied wanting to end the conversation

"I can't believe a beautiful girl like you at an event like this doesn't have much going on in her life" he said

"Well it's true I'm just a student I'm here with my boyfriend" I said

"I don't see a boyfriend" he teased

"Well he's here he's just talking to some people" I said

"Leaving me free to talk to you" he said

He continued to try and flirt with me while I didn't respond which only seemed to make things worse as his arm then slid round my waist so he could try and get my attention.

Kenan's POV

Going to this after party was an awful idea from the second we entered the door I've had people pull me into different conversations meaning I've left y/n on her own the whole time. I've tried to escape a few times but every time someone else wants to talk to me so instead I've just been checking on y/n from a distance. For most of the night she's been sat at a table by herself with a drink she hasn't touched until some guy went and sat next to her. From what I could tell she didn't really want to talk to him so she moved away but then my view was blocked so I just had to trust that she'd be able to stand up for herself.

After what felt like forever the people blocking my view got out the way allowing me to see that the guy was still sat next to y/n. She looked just as disinterested as before but she was talking to him so I just made sure to keep watching out for her. Then he leaned in closer which immediately made me mad but I let it slide until his hand went round her waist. That was too much for me no one gets to put their hand on my girlfriend especially not under my watch. There's nothing I hate more than watching people flirt with my girlfriend which happens far more than it should but I never like to show how much it annoys me as I don't want y/n to think I'm jealous as I don't trust her. I can keep my mouth shut watching a waiter or classmate flirt with y/n but having another guy hold her waist is beyond where I draw the line I don't care if I look jealous or crazy I can't just watch this happen. I excused myself from the conversation I was involved in and made a beeline straight for y/n.

I tried to look calm as I slid in next to her and took the guys hand off her waist so I could replace it with mine. Y/n looked at me with pure relief in her eyes which told me I'd made the right decision to come over. The guy looked at me like he was about to say something until he seemed to realise who I was and he shut his mouth. He still looked mad that I'd taken the girl he was flirting with but I don't care one bit he can hate me if I want I'm not letting him try and steal my girlfriend.

"Dude don't try and steal her I was here first" the guy slurred clearly drunk

"I think you should leave my girlfriend alone" I said as calmly as I could manage

"She's not your girlfriend she didn't mention you" he said

"I told you I had a boyfriend" y/n said

"She told you she had a boyfriend and you still tried to get with her dude just leave us alone or I'll ask security to kick you out" I said getting mad

The guy rolled his eyes but he got up and walked away anyway. He looked back a few times so I took the liberty of kissing y/n while he was watching and right in front of everyone else so that no one else tries anything. I thought she'd be a bit embarrassed kissing me in public as she's not one for pda but she happily kissed me back. When we pulled away she had a smile on her face but I could see in her eyes that she was thinking about something.

“What’s on your mind?” I asked

“Its just I liked seeing you jealous I appreciate that you don’t get jealous over little things but it’s nice watching you get all protective over me” she admitted suddenly getting a bit shy

“I will always be protective of you I’m never going to let another guy touch you like that but I wasn’t jealous” I said

“You were jealous I can tell by the look in your eyes it’s the same look you have when waiters flirt with me but it’s ok I’ll always be yours you’ve got nothing to worry about” she said

“Good because I’m never letting you go” I said

We’d both had enough of the after party by this point so we just left without saying goodbye to anyone and went back to our hotel so I can show her how much I love her and why I’m better than any other guy.

#kenan yildiz x reader #kenan yildiz imagine #kenan yildiz #football imagine

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heartshapedpolaroid · 3 days ago

Text

it’s bitterness at best

warnings: smut, angst, emotional cheating i guess but not on reader

word count: 2.1k

18+ mdni

It’s been over a year since he last saw you. He still remembers the day you’d left, he always will. The day you’d left to go to New York. For college, as if England didn’t have enough schools… and good ones, too. But he’d understood it, it was Juilliard after all. There’s no better place in the world for performing arts. He wasn’t going to stop you from chasing your dream. He already had his, it would only be fair to let you have yours too. He’d wanted to come with you, but you both knew it wouldn’t work. The guys are here, the studio, and they had an album to record. He’d suggested long distance, but you both knew that would be fruitless. The distance would hurt much more knowing the there was someone alone and waiting on a different continent, longing for their other half. You’d promised to text him the next time you were in the area. Now it’s been fifteen months. Sometimes he thinks you’ve forgotten about him by now. But that doesn’t mean that he stopped looking for you. Every woman that even remotely looks like you still catches his eye, and for a split second he’ll let himself believe that it’s you again.

So he did with the woman that’s currently under him. She has the same hair colour as you and that was enough for him. Has been enough for the last few months now. It has to be. His fingers on her clit move mechanically, love-less, like an automated action. He doesn’t actually care if she finishes, but he needs that extra tightness to push himself over the edge. It used to be different with you. God, it was so different with you. Better. There were times he’d barely lasted a minute once he finally got to be inside you. He had to do his best to hold back and last for you. Now he’s doing his best to make it end as soon as possible.

She’s different from you. Too different. He thought that maybe if he’d close his eyes and picture you it would be okay. But no matter how much he tried, it didn’t work. She feels too different. He didn’t think that was even possible. A cunt is a cunt, isn’t it? And he’s never really cared before you. It always felt good. Hot, wet, and tight. But she doesn’t grip him the same way you did, doesn’t pulse and melt around him in the same way.

He can’t stand to look at her face anymore, so he buries his in her neck instead. Mistake. Her scent fills his nostrils at an overwhelming rate. She smells too different. Sweet, like vanilla and candy, way too sweet for his liking. You smelled better. More floral. Fruity. Like a flower field in spring. He liked that, even when it was cold and rainy outside, you made him feel all warm and full of life. He grunts and pulls back.

“Turn around,” he mumbles. Maybe this way it’ll be better. He won’t have to see her face or be so close to her. She complies eagerly, and he hates how desperate she seems. It vaguely reminds him of you, but with the big difference that when you did it, he found it incredibly hot. It made him want nothing more than to give you everything that you’d wanted at the drop of a hat. Now he’s just annoyed. He’s glad she can’t see the way he rolls his eyes when she arches her back, wiggling her hips back at him as she rests her head on her arms. He just pushes back in, gripping her hips for stability. She moans as he starts moving again, and he hates the sound.

It’s too high-pitched. Whiny. Desperate. Exaggerated. It’s like she’s putting on a show for him, like she knows he’s not enjoying himself. It makes him feel even worse. Your moans and whines were music to his ears. No matter how loud or eager you got, he’d always tried to get more out of you. To make you scream. He’d revelled in the way he could make you lose control, always eager to hear every last sound that escaped your lips, constantly needing more. The more the better. Yours were never fake. He knew exactly where to touch you to make you cry out in pleasure. How to move his hips. What to say.

His eyes travel over her back, from her shoulders over her spine down to her hips. Her ass that jiggles slightly with each thrust. But something is missing. There is always something missing. You had moles sprinkled over your back, not many, just a handful, and one of them on your left buttcheek, which you never were aware of until he’d pointed it out. You’d blushed, and he loved it. He made sure to kiss it every time you were positioned in front of him like this, telling you how cute it was. “You know what they say about moles? That they’re where your partner in your past life kissed you the most?” You’d raised your eyebrows at him. “You’re saying my past lover kissed my left ass cheek?” “Can you blame them?”, he’d grinned, leaning down to press a kiss to your right cheek. “Now you’ll have one on your other cheek to match.” Your laugh had echoed through the room, his heart skipping a bit at the gleeful sound. God, how he loved you.

He angles his hips in the way that would have made you come undone in seconds, needing that tiny bit of familiarity, just to keep his fantasy of you alive. Her whine pulls him out of it instantly. She doesn’t like it like that. He groans, though she probably can’t tell it’s out of annoyance and not pleasure. She pushes back against him, moving her hips against his. He complies. Maybe if he just gives her what she wants, it’ll be over quicker. And he needs it to be over. But he needs her to finish before he does, or else he knows she’ll make him use his fingers or mouth to get her off too. And he really doesn’t want to spend more time on her than necessary. Touch her more than necessary.

It's not like he doesn’t like to make his partners feel good. It’s just that he had stopped caring about anyone who came after you. And he can’t bear the thought of going down on her. He’s done it before, but he didn’t like it. Not because she’d tasted bad – she didn’t. She tasted fine. Like a pussy tastes. But she didn’t taste like you.

His favourite place used to be between your thighs. He could spend hours on end making you melt on his tongue, licking up every last drop you gave him, drinking it down eagerly. Like he’d been stuck in a desert and you’re the first drop of water he’s had in days. He just couldn’t get enough of it, even when you were oversensitive and had to push him away, he’d always want more. He’d pout, begging you to let him have it just one more time. Just one more orgasm from you and he’d be done. Just one more lick, one more taste. Just one more.

With a grunt he snakes his hand around her waist, pressing his fingers back to her clit. He’s tired, he needs her to finish, and it looks like she’s not going to do anything to help with that anytime soon. She moans, tightening around him. His name falls off her lips not long after and he cringes at the sound. He fucks her through it, his thrusts getting harder as he tries to find his own release. It’s a few seconds later that she winces, her hips wiggling away from him. She always gets sensitive after she comes. So did you, but you’d still let him keep fucking you after. You needed him to. She doesn’t.

He pulls out, and she turns around instantly, scrambling to get on her knees for him. He sighs and lets her take his cock in her mouth. She’s sloppy, uncoordinated, messy. She’s trying too damn hard. It’s frustrating. He allows her to keep going a bit longer, trying to picture you, the way you’d take him down your throat so effortlessly. How you’d tease him, licking the vein along his cock, kissing the tip. How you’d look up at him through your lashes as you’d let him sink past your lips. He likes it slow, the way you’d build him up slowly, taking him a little deeper with every bob of your head. How you’d gag a little when he hits the back of your throat, but you still kept him there because you knew how much he loved to feel your throat closing around him when you’d swallow, even if there were tears pooling in your eyes. How eager to please you were, wanting to make him feel good, taste him. The spit dripping down your chin as you refused to pull off, one hand stroking what you couldn’t fit in your mouth, the other playing with his balls. Completely devoted to him, focused only on his pleasure, doing everything you could.

With a hand in her hair he pulls her off, holding her head in place as he wraps his other hand around his cock. He can’t stand the way she sucks him off, his own hand would do a much better job. She doesn’t complain, instead pushes her boobs up and together with her hands, looking up at him with her mouth open. Strained grunts fall from his lips as he jerks himself, quick, knowing she won’t let up until he came. He’d much rather be alone right now, that way he could really indulge himself, maybe even wrap your one pair of panties that are still laying in the otherwise empty drawer that once was yours around his cock, using them to stroke himself.

He closes his eyes as he gets close, imagining it’s you on your knees for him. He presses his lips together in a fine line, knowing the only thing leaving his throat would be your name if he allowed himself to make noise. His hips jerk into his fist as he comes, his release landing somewhere between her chin and her tits. He doesn’t really care where it goes. In his mind he’s painting your face with his cum. You’d always looked so pretty whenever you’d allowed him to do that, the way your tongue would dart out to taste what had landed on your lips.

He falls back into the mattress as he catches his breath, not even bothering to open his eyes. He’s always been one to fall asleep fast after an orgasm, but he’d willed himself to stay awake for you. To help you clean up, get you some water, hold you close, whisper sweet nothings in your ear. He would do his best try to stay awake until you were asleep, and he’d rarely succeeded. Well, he thought he did, because you’d pretended to be asleep so he could let himself relax. He was too tired to tell the difference anyways.

She gets up to clean herself, not saying anything. It’s always been like this. He doesn’t like to talk after. She figured that’s just the way he is. When she comes back and gets into bed beside him, he’s already fast asleep. He doesn’t like it when she stays, but he lets her anyways. The white sheet is draped lazily over his lower half, messy strands of his hair falling into his forehead that tend to tickle his eyelids. You would always brush them out his face so tenderly, careful not to wake him, but he’s a light sleeper on stressful days so he still felt your comforting touch occasionally. Soft snores escape him, his chest rising and falling rhythmically. He doesn’t stir when his phone dings, the screen lighting up.

Her heart stops. It’s late. No one would text him at this hour. If it was an emergency, they’d call.

She doesn’t need to look to confirm it, but she does anyways. Lifting herself up on her elbow, she glances over his sleeping form, at the phone on his nightstand.

“I just landed in London.”

a/n: hello... welcome back if u remember me. its ohladymoon. if not, hi :) guess im back now with a new username and everything lol

#alex turner x reader #alex turner smut #alex turner x fem!reader #alex turner angst #alex turner fic #alex turner fanfic #user.heartshapedpolaroid

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natsusleftbootyhole · 14 hours ago

Text

In half broken japanese, i wrote to you

ft. 2nd yr bakugo x 2nd yr gn-reader, (+ small hints of izuku, ochaco, mina + kiri)

summary: an attempt to make your ex katsuki jealous, the attempt backfires. (small hints of crack/unhingedness)

warnings: TOXIC EXES, deadass they cannot stop being petty, swearing obvi, bakugo being desperate, mention of ships : Mini x kirishima + ochaco x toga (however if you dont like these ships, imagine they're really good friends instead :P)

translations: 愛してる oh 愛して: I love you oh i love you.

w.c: (how many words in the ff)

authors note: HEYY, first fanfic in a while, i hope you like it ≽^•⩊•^≼, also izuku is implied to be questioning his sexuality in the story, but to make it clear he does NOT have a crush on reader. hes just a good pal

"愛してる oh 愛してる"

Katsuki Bakugo wasn't a man who tended to show affection, he often acted indifferent to your acts of love.

Take last years valentines day for example, your first (and only) valentines together. You saw all your other friends get teddy bears and flowers from their lovers, the thought of receiving flowers and chocolates from kats made your heart swell. 8 pm. The only message he sent you that day, your smile widened as you hurried to get ready in your date night attire, doing your hair just right to match the outfit. Only to be crushed when he showed up, empty handed and confused at your attire.

"what the fuck are you wearing" he scoffed. You looked down and saw him in his usual gym wear, an old vest and basketball shorts.

"you said to be ready by 8... im confused, dont you have something planned for valentines?"

there was a beat of silence before katsuki finally spoke up again, only for him to burst out laughing.

"you're joking right? why would i waste my time on valentines, its pointless anyways - just there to spend money on useless shit, i told you to be ready by 8 for the gym. now come on, we're sparing today"

...

`are you fucking serious`, you thought. Your face fell as bakugo turned to the door of your dorm and started walking away, not even looking behind him to see if you were following.

The door slammed shut as the memories of what happened ran through your head.

you grabbed your phone, eyes stinging from the tears brimming your eyes, clicking on katsukis contact.

You pressed the block button. He's gone. It's for the best, you repeat over and over again.

it's for the best.

at least thats what you told yourself, you were distraught. Although katsuki didn't express his love as often as you would like him to or the fact that he got exceptionally jealous when you were around any man, or the fact that he still kept you at arms length, even after months of dating. He still had his moments, like when he would remember the tiniest details about your stories, or the way he always stared lovingly at you, when he thought you weren't looking.

This is gonna be a difficult few months, how could you get over him?

The 10 months since your split has gone by relatively fast, for you anyway. you were devastated for the first 4 months, until you found out katsuki had been messaging a girl from another school, her name was camie? cassie?, you didn't care. after that you lost all sadness for the blond bastard. Instead, you didn't care for the name bakugo katsuki. instead, you started to warm up to the "extras", one being izuku, you could even say that the two of you became very good friends.

Katsuki knew he messed up, he knew he messed up when his mother tore him apart for "losing such a nice S/O", he knew he messed up trying to be petty, messaging camie when he didn't even like her to get a reaction out of you. he knew he messed up when he saw you slowly get over him, the long lasting looks you shared with deku. out of everyone, why did it have to be fucking deku.

14th December 2024

As a way to thank the students for their continual hard work, the school implemented a few seasonal balls a year, only 2 months away was the valentines ball. and you were dreading it.

All of your girl friends had their lovers, ochako had her "secret" villain girlfriend and mina had kirishima, a few of the other class mates had each other as well. it felt depressing, but its not like katsuki would even take you to the ball if you were still dating... would he?

who cares, that chapter is closed, its time to officially move on.

The next day at school, you were sitting around the lunch table with mina and ochako, ranting to them about how you needed to offically get over Katsuki.

"-AND he would never send me good morning or goodnight messages, he would barely even message me at all, let alone talk to me in school. Its like he was embarrassed of me. That i was too weak to be seen with him. Maybe thats why he was messaging that girl cassie or whatever her name was." you paused to breath, and take a sip of your drink. "...i need to get over him."

"girl, you only just realised that. Hm but i dont know, eijiro told me that he hasnt been dealing with the breakup all that well either" mina interrupted before going back to her ramen.

before you could question mina about what she meant uraraka buted in.

"ohhh, i have a plan..you`ll get over bakugo in your own time, but while you heal.. why dont you be a little petty. pay him back from the whole camie situation" She smirked before going back on her phone.

"Girl, i swear toga is rubbing her evilness on you.... it is a good plan tho" mina smirked. they both turned to look at you, with smirks on their faces.

You looked back and forth between the girls before sighing.

"what did you have in mind".

1 month to go to the ball. and the girls and you have slowly setting you plan into action, even including eijiro in your little plan. all you had to do was finally ask.

you could feel yourself shaking as you walked the short walk to izukus room, trying to control your breathing. `what is he says no, what if he thinks this is rude and disrespectful, what if he tells kats your plan??!`

the voices stopped as you finally reached izukus room, its now or never.

KNOCK KNOCK

the sound echoed before the green haired cutie opened his door and welcomed you inside. This wasn't the first time you`ve been in izukus room alone before, at first you thought izuku had a crush on you and thats why he would often stare at you or get very shy around you, turns out he was incredibly fascinated with your quirk but was too shy to talk you you about it. When he finally came up to you to explain the situation, you actually laughed so hard you ended up on the floor cry laughing. and you've been best friends ever since. nothing more.

"i need you're help" you start.

"okayyy..."

"its to do with katsuki"

The room fell silent has his expression changed from confusion to smirking.

"what with..." he sounded cheeky, like he knew something that you didnt. you gave him a weird look and carried on.

"soo, me and the girls were talking. Would it be okay if we pretend to be a couple for the ball. we wont have to kiss or anything like that, just be matching and stay close to each other for the whole evening. i realised that i officially needed to get over katsuki. but while im doing that i wanted to get back at him for the whole camie thing. will you help me out, i know you're one of the people he doesn't like and you're such a good friend that i thought it wouldn't be weird to ask you, right.." You were rambling, you know that but hopefully he understands your point and agrees.

A shocked but smirking izuku greats you when you finally look up from your lap.

"Fuck yea i will, anything to annoy kacchan"

You both burst out laughing and get to planning straight away.

over the next few months, you and izuku became inseparable, from walking to class, going to lunch together and hanging out in each others rooms every week. in all honestly, in pissed katsuki off. What was going on, why were you spending so much time with him of all people. why should he care, you're over. he should move on. but he cant. He was so in-love with you... is he still? he doesn't know.

One night, he decided to call eijiro. he needed to talk to someone, the thoughts of you have been fogging his mind, the way you changed your hair, it complemented you more. you started embracing your hobbies more, taking more photos and posting more. you seemed happier, like how you seemed when you were together. He hates not being apart of your happiness.

"eijiro, im fucked man.. i cant stop thinking of Y/N"

"dude, i heard they're going to the ball thing with izuku, try talk to them after the ball"

Fuck. He knows that you two were close but, going to a valentines dance together?

"eh i dont know, i dont think i could see them wrapped around his all, all lovey dovey and shit"

"well im going so, if you wanna come at-least youll have some company".

Valentines day, 2025

3 shots down, music blaring, and now after 3 hours, you were finally ready and prepared for the ball. grabbing your phone and taking one last vodka shot with mina, you hastily make your way down the dorm stairs and out into the chilly air of valentines night.

Leaning against the brick wall of the dorm building, you stare up into the sky. 'Would it be better if I was going with katsuki.. maybe.. would he change. who knows.'

Hearing the dorm building door open, you see a slightly tipsy izuku stumbling before catching your eye and speed walking over to you.

"Y/N, omg, you look so gorgeous.. I might even be falling for you." He gave you a long teasing smirk before you both burst out laughing.

Out of the corner of your eye, you spot a certain blonde stare down izuku. He looked like he wanted to grab his neck and blow his head off. If it wasn't for kirishima physically holding bakugo back, he would've done it.

"When is our Uber getting here to take us to the ball?! I'm fucking freezing"

izuku checks his phone, and a few seconds later, a sleek, black car pulls into the driveway.

"it's here," he takes your hand and walks you to the car before opening your door for you.

The scowl that marked bakugos' face was deadly. He was plotting his plan of action tonight. He needs to win you back. He craves you.

Throughout the night, you and katsuki kept making eye contact. much to your displeasure. regardless of the constant reminding of his existence. You dance the night away(mostly dancing and grinding with izuku, in hopes to make katsuki jealous) drinking spiked coke and laughing as hard as you had in the last year, you hadn't laughed this hard without katsuki. Fuck, He looks so good in that all black suit.

You miss him, and you miss him a lot. and you need to throw up.

Begrudgingly, you made your way towards the balcony to catch some fresh air, leaning against the beautiful concrete railing, staring out against the night sky.

"....Y/N"

you recognise that voice.

whipping your head around, your hands gripping on to the railing to steady yourself.

"katsuki.." He looks desperate... has he been crying?!

"fuck. I'm so mad at you, I love you. I love you so fucking much. the day you left me was the worst day of my life. you were my sunshine, my reason to keep fighting. I know I fucked up with you, I took you for granted, please trust me when I say that I've changed. the whole thing with camie was so stupid that I should never have done that. I know that now. I never wanted her. i need you back with me, I need to be yours. you look so good today, and watching deku parade you around like you were his made me so fucking mad. I know you don't want him, eijiro told me your plan, I understand why you did it. and your plan fucking worked. it made me realise I didn't want any other man to have the privilege of calling such a perfect person their lover. please, I'll be better Y/N. I'm begging you"

You were shocked, you froze. The burning of your eyes and the feeling of tears streaming down your cheeks. You broke into a full blown sob, running into katsukis arms and crying into his very expensive suit.

"woah! woah! are you okay?!" He grabbed you by the shoulders and pulled you back to observe your face.

"Please tell me you're not messing with me.." The sound of you forcing out words throughout sobs broke katsukis' heart. he had hurt you, so bad. But he's going to fix it. He needs to.

"Y/N i promise, if you take me back i promise I will grow and talk and love you the way you deserve to be loved."

"... you're going to have to gain my trust again.. I want to try again, so bad, but you need to understand how badly you treated me and how you hurt me. I still love you, I never stopped loving you. I don't think I ever could."

He nodded and pulled you into his chest. The faint noise of a slow dance played from inside the closed balcony doors. he grabbed your hand in his, and held your waist with his other hand. swaying to the sound of the music.

You both smile softly at each other, resting your foreheads on each other's.

"You still owe me two years' worth of valentines celebrations," you giggle, closing your eyes, still swaying.

"Trust me, you're getting spoilt.."

a beat of silence fell upon the crisp night air, before katsuki spoke up whispering in your ear.

..愛して..

#mha x reader #mha bakugou #mha bakugo katsuki #mha bakugo x reader #katsuki bakugo x reader #bakugou katsuki #bakugou x reader #bnha bakugou #hes a little shit bit i love him #bnha x reader #mha smau #bnha smau

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everwhovian · 3 days ago

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what remains. | Hwang brothers

next part | masterlist

Part 1: In-ho meeting his baby brother

The room was dark. In-ho stood frozen in the doorway, fingers tightening around the strap of his bag. He reached out, fingers hovering over the switch, but he didn’t flick it on. The only light spilling into the room came from the hallway. In-ho waited. His eyes adjusted to the dim glow flickering through the curtains, casting soft shadows over the crib in the corner. It was smaller than he expected.

In-ho swallowed hard. He’d known about the baby for weeks now, but knowing and seeing weren’t the same. This wasn’t just an idea anymore, some distant concept of a sibling. No, this was real.

He hesitated, still standing perfectly still in the doorway. In-ho could recall the voice of his mother, the disgusting tone when she told him about his father and his now stepmother. Growing up, In-ho had always known that his parents had issues, but seeing the living breathing consequence of those issues… the reason why his parents finalized their divorce…

He shook his head. He banished the voice of his mother, biting his own lip to keep the traitorous words inside his mind, he didn’t want to repeat those words. The baby was not at fault for his parents’ issues. It was wrong for his mother to blame an innocent child.

He let the strap of his bag slip from his shoulder, slowly placing the bag down on the floor, before he dared taking a step into the room. It was so quiet. He took step after step, hesitantly, his footsteps barely making a sound against the floor. He stopped mere inches away from the crib, his torso bending forward until his arms rested on the wooden railing of the crib. He peered inside.

The baby stirred, his tiny hands curling into fists, his chest rising and falling with quiet, even breaths. In-ho stifled a gasp, taking a deep breath through his nose. He reminded himself that he had known about the baby – this half-brother – but standing here now, watching the rise and fall of a life so new, so fragile, made it real in a way he hasn’t prepared for. This was real. His half-brother was real.

And for the first time in his sixteen years, In-ho wasn’t sure what to do next.

He couldn’t remember what he had expected to feel. Maybe nothing. Maybe resentment, fuelled by his mother’s venomous comments. But instead, there was just… silence. A strange, hollow kind of stillness.

The baby. His half-brother. His father’s child. A stranger, and yet, blood. Something unfamiliar tightened in his chest.

He didn’t know how to be a brother, he’d never thought he’d have to be one. While he focused on the baby’s tiny chest, counting the quiet, even breaths, he wondered if that even mattered.

In-ho glanced at the small dresser next to the crib, recognizing the stuffed toy sitting on it. A tiny smile tugged on the corner of his mouth. It was his stuffed toy. The same well-loved duck In-ho had carried around everywhere when he was a toddler. In-ho had sifted through his desk months ago, when his father first acknowledged the existence of the baby, and had given the duck to his stepmother in lieu of a proper present. Now, the duck sat next to the crib, watching over the baby, as if a part of In-ho had been there all along.

His eyes drifted from the duck to a framed photo and next to it, a neatly embroidered blanket draped over the edge. The stitching was slightly uneven, like someone had done it by hand, but the name was clear enough: Jun-ho.

In-ho swallowed, unsure what he was even doing here, what he was supposed to feel. His hand hovered hesitantly over the crib before, without thinking, he reached down.

Jun-ho was so small, impossibly small. His face soft and peaceful in sleep. In-ho’s fingertips brushed against the warm, delicate skin, and then – tiny fingers curled around his own.

In-ho froze.

Jun-ho’s tiny fingers were warm and oh so small, but still holding on with surprising strength. He didn’t even know who In-ho was. He didn’t know what a brother was, didn’t understand the weight of the world, or the choices that had led to this moment. But none of that mattered. He held on anyway. Without question. Without hesitation.

In-ho swallowed hard, his throat tight. It was a strange thing to be trusted so easily. No one had ever handed him trust before. He had always had to earn it, to fight for it. But here was this tiny, helpless baby, offering it without a second thought. It was terrifying. And it was something else too – something he couldn’t quite name, something that made his chest feel heavy and hollow at the same time.

Jun-ho trusted him. Expected him to be there. And for the first time, In-ho realized just how much that meant. Because if this baby trusted him… maybe, just maybe, he couldn’t let him down.

❛ ━━━━━━･❪ ○△□ ❫ ･━━━━━━ ❜

next part | masterlist

A/N: I decided to post the scenes again separately for whatever reason. I intend to dive into their relationship and write a lot more little scenes and scenarios of Jun-ho growing up, and it's easier to organize the scenes chronologically by posting them separately.

English is not my first language!

#what remains hwang brothers #hwang brothers #hwang bros #hwang siblings #hwang inho #hwang in ho #hwang jun ho #hwang junho #squid game #squid game fanfic #squid game spoilers #inho and junho #in ho and jun ho #siblings #sibling bonding

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aquaholicsanonymousworld · 2 days ago

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Close Call

Pairing: Matt Murdock x Reader

Summary: They had been rivals since law school, competing over every case, every argument, every win. Now, forced to work together at Nelson & Murdock, their battles never stopped—until the night Daredevil saved her.

Inspired by: @bellaxgiornata 's fic Catcalling the Devil

She never should have taken Foggy’s offer.

She knew it the second she walked into Nelson & Murdock and saw him sitting there, looking as smug as ever behind his desk, sunglasses perched on his nose, that half-smile that drove her insane.

Matthew Murdock.

They had been at each other’s throats since law school, competing for everything, arguing over everything. And now, thanks to Foggy’s insistent persuasion, she had left her secure position at Hogarth, Chao & Benowitz to work here. With him.

The fights had picked up right where they left off. Every case was a battle, every meeting a war of words. The worst part? It wasn’t just annoying—it was fun. Infuriating, exhausting fun.

"You know, I think you secretly like arguing with him," Foggy commented one day over lunch, grinning as he watched her pick apart one of Matt’s arguments on a case brief.

She scoffed. "I tolerate it. There’s a difference."

"Right. Just like you tolerate the way you always sit next to him in meetings, even though you complain about it after."

She stabbed a piece of lettuce on her plate. "I sit there because I like to keep an eye on him. He’s sneaky."

Foggy laughed. "He’s blind."

"Exactly." She shot him a look. "Which means he’s had to be even more sneaky to survive."

Later that afternoon, she found herself standing at Matt’s office door, arms crossed as he leaned back in his chair, looking uncharacteristically amused.

"Something on your mind?" he asked, tapping a pen lightly against his desk.

She narrowed her eyes. "Just wondering how you manage to always be wrong in our debates but still sound like you know what you’re talking about."

He grinned. "Years of practice. And natural talent."

She rolled her eyes. "That’s debatable."

"Everything’s debatable. That’s why we’re lawyers."

She sighed, shaking her head. "I swear, Murdock, one of these days I’m going to win so decisively, you’ll have no choice but to admit it."

He smirked. "Looking forward to it."

And then last night happened.

She had gone out with some friends, one drink turning into five, then a walk home turning into a bad decision when she took a shortcut down a dark alley. She had barely registered the figures stepping out of the shadows before a blur of red and black dropped from above.

Daredevil.

He had taken them down effortlessly, turned to her with a voice like rough velvet. “You okay?”

She should have been terrified. But instead, she had laughed, still tipsy, barely processing. “If I’d known you’d save me, I would’ve stayed out later.”

He had been quiet for a moment, tilting his head slightly. "Be careful next time." His voice was softer now, more personal, like it wasn’t just a warning—it was something else. Concern? Familiarity? She wasn’t sure, but she felt it settle in her chest.

She blinked up at him, the alcohol in her system making everything feel slightly unreal. "You always this polite to drunk girls in alleyways, or am I special?"

He huffed a quiet breath, almost like a laugh. "You should go home."

She should’ve. She should have thanked him, walked away, let it be. But instead, she reached out, fingers grazing the cool leather of his glove. "Why do you do it?"

He stiffened slightly, as if surprised by the question. "Someone has to."

She let her hand drop, watching as he lingered for just a second too long. And then, like a ghost dissolving into the night, he was gone.

Now, sitting in the office the next morning with coffee and donuts, she was recounting the entire thing to Foggy, Karen, and, unfortunately, Matt.

“And God—he was hot. Like, unfairly hot,” she groaned, taking a sip of coffee. “That voice? That jawline? Jesus.”

Karen bit into her donut to hide a laugh. Foggy shot a glance at Matt, who had been oddly quiet, just stirring his coffee.

“Wild,” Foggy said, grinning. “So, you think Daredevil’s hot, huh?”

“Duh, Foghorn!” she said, rolling her eyes. “Who wouldn’t?”

Matt cleared his throat, still stirring. “I’m sure he’d appreciate the compliment.”

She frowned. "You're being weirdly nice today."

Not a single argument all morning. No sarcastic remarks. Just…polite smiles and agreeable nods.

Suspicion crept up her spine. “Why are you looking at me like that, Murdock?”

Matt simply sipped his coffee. “No reason.”

Karen and Foggy exchanged a look. She narrowed her eyes. Something was up.

But for now, she had bigger mysteries to solve. Like how she could get Daredevil to save her again.

#daredevil #daredevil fanfiction #matt murdock x reader #daredevil born again #fanfic #imagine #oneshot #daredevil x reader #charlie cox #matt murdock fanfic #matthew murdock #foggy nelson #karen page #matt murdock

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storm-and-starlight · 2 days ago

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farewell, wanderlust

I don't know if I'm ever gonna finish this fic or even even really post it, but just like Meteoric, here's a section that I think stands well alone and that I really quite like. Dick finds Jason post-Bruce's "death" in Final Crisis. Operates off of UTRH movie canon.

Dick had the courtesy to find him in person, plainclothed, appearing out of nowhere at a tea shop Jason still stops in at, sometimes. It's one of the places Alfred buys from, a sharply astringent Earl Grey -- Jason, he'd said, low and soft at his shoulder, and Jason had turned on his heel and left without paying, boots thumping oddly on the cobblestones (Old Gotham, god, he hates this part of the city, pretending like the battered streets and ancient buildings are somehow charming, pretending it's someplace sweet and touristy and safe, pretending like it hasn't got just as much rot as the rest of the place -- Scarecrow attacked this street six months ago, gassed half the market, and now all that's left of that is a handful of signs in various shops saying "respirators sold here!"), chilled to the bone even in the summer swelter. The city had already recovered from the alien invasion or zombie apocalypse or whatever-the-fuck-it-was that had the League all over the place a week ago; the rest of the world might still be reeling, but not Gotham.

Jason! Dick had said, loud and surprised, and then gentler, cut to carry, Jay, little wing-- and Jason had frozen where he stood, middle of the street, crowd splitting around him like a running river until Dick had found him again. He'd been dressed in civvies: black tee, battered leather, worn jeans, perfectly nondescript. Hair a wild tumbledown mess, windblown and ragged. Hadn't slept in at least three days, but he'd had a bright-burning clarity to his eyes; Nightwing, clinging on to sanity when the rest of the world's gone mad.

Jason hadn't seen him this close up in years -- he'd been a shadow at Bruce's heels, a bright figure against the skyline, always at least arms-length and the barrel of a gun distant.

He was-- so much shorter than Jason thought he remembered.

Don't, Jason had said, sharp -- there's a gun under his jacket and Dick's here in civvies and this is Gotham, after all, what's a little mid-street-weapon-pulling to a native, and Dick had said We need to-- we should talk.

So talk, and Dick had flicked a glance out at the heaving crowd around them and said not here. At-- do you remember Wilhelm? and Jason does, only a single bright flash of a memory but still there despite the holes the Pit ate in his head -- Dick, younger and shaggy-haired and larger than life, dangling one-handed from the talons of the saddest damn gryphon Jason's ever seen, grinning up at him; "second-best hiding spot in the city, little wing" -- and he jerks his head in a nod.

Midnight, Dick had said, and swirled back into the crowd before Jason could even acknowledge that, gone again in the current of humanity.

He'd paid for the tea, too, the bastard.

---

He arrives at Wilhelm's corner at sixteen minutes past the stroke of midnight -- there was a church here once that still rang the hour every hour, Westminster quarters marking out the passage of the night. It's gone now, nineteenth-century masonry apparently not up to the task of surviving an earthquake (a goddamn earthquake, what the fuck) but he can still hear the ghost of it, echoing over the years. All through this hour, Lord be my guide. Wilhelm's still standing, leaning gloomily over the street, but the gap between his wings is empty -- even the replacement's too big to fit, now. Nightwing's waiting on the roof instead, a dark shape silhouetted against the orange sky, lantern-light bleeding the color from his insignia. Batman's nowhere to be seen.

"Jason," Nightwing says when he lands beside him, heavier than any Robin has a right to be.

Jason snorts. "What happened to no names in the field? The old man leaves for a week and all the rules go out the window?"

Dick-- flinches.

Jason pauses. Bruce is still off on League business -- another day, another dollar, another planet-ending threat -- and he hasn't come back yet, leaving Nightwing and Robin to keep an eye on Gotham. He'd assumed it was just-- cleanup, like usual after shit like this goes down, or maybe he was off in space chasing down the guy who did it, but this is-- this is Dick naming him Jason, full-formal, not the name he took to scare the shit out of Bruce or the tattered remnant of a childhood he can't even remember.

"What happened?"

"Bruce--" Dick says, and falters, and stops.

There's a siren in the distance, wailing away; the rattle of old and ill-maintained ventilation systems; the clacking rush of the train going through. The ghost of ringing bells, long-gone and buried; the salt-sting of the Pit in his eyes; grave-dirt under his nails and on his tongue -- all through this hour.

"How?" he says, and the helmet flattens it, turns it into just another electronic snarl, but he hears the scrape of a shattered voice anyways.

"Darkseid," and well, okay, Jason does have to admit that motherfucking Darkseid probably is one of the only people who ever could have done it. The Joker sure as hell wasn't fucking going to.

"Are you..."

"I-- saw the body." Jason's silent for long enough that Dick says "Jay," reaching out for his shoulder -- Jason twitches back and away, sharply, and Dick's hand drops limply back to his side.

"So he's dead, then," and it rings flatly in the air, the blade striking, the hammer coming down. "The fuck am I supposed to do about it?"

"Jay--" Dick says again, but Jason's got salt under his tongue and the Pit in his blood and he can feel the anger rising. "What, I'm supposed to-- say I'm sorry? Sit politely at the funeral? Come home? Have you forgotten that I'm not fucking one of you anymore?" The warehouse, the Joker, the gun -- I would have done nothing but search the planet for this pathetic pile of evil, death-worshipping garbage and sent him off to hell! -- Batman, walking away.

"Jason," Nightwing snaps, sharp and furious and Bat-vigilante to the bone, and then he sighs and he's right back to Dick Grayson again, trying to carry the weight of the world and not quite managing. "Jason, I-- you deserved to know."

He can hear what Dick's not quite saying underneath: you were Robin, once.

You were still his son.

The silence echoes.

"Alfred?" Jason asks, eventually, when the seethe in his blood isn't quite so strong.

"He's... holding up," Dick says carefully. "Better than I was, at first, but..." He rolls his wrist outward, a restless motion. "You know how he is."

"Yeah."

The Gotham quiet -- which isn't actually quiet in any sense of the word, just a constant background hum of trains and traffic and police sirens and the odd intermittent scream -- filters back in. It sounds different than it used to, though maybe that's just the brain damage. He misses the bells, every hour on the hour -- he can hear Alfred's voice humming Big Ben's prayer along with the chimes of the Manor clocks. All through this hour Lord be my guide, that by Thy power no foot shall slide. A good prayer for Robins, he'd called it, if you're going to be running about on rooftops in the middle of the night, and Jason had never quite believed the way Catherine once had but he'd still sung along at midnights, fleet-footed and sure on the spires and skyscrapers.

"I'm sorry," he says, at last.

Dick doesn't look at him. "Me too."

---

The dawn finds him still awake, leaning over the chipped counter of his latest base with a mug between his hands -- Earl Grey with rosemary and rose, an indulgence, a memory -- the warm golden haven of the Manor kitchen with all the windows black-backed mirrors in the predawn darkness, Jason bleary-eyed and up entirely too early and Alfred as crisply put together as ever, pouring water over tea leaves and letting the steam curl sweet and sharp up into the air -- it had been special, somehow, though now he can't remember why. The smell of the tea Dick paid for is the same, even all these gaping years later -- black tea and rose and bergamot, sweet and sharp -- and he closes his eyes tight, trying to shut out the salt in them still.

#batfamily #batman #batman fic #nightwing #red hood #dick grayson #jason todd #storm's writing #storm's fic #storytelling

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perfectsunlight · 18 hours ago

Text

[35] DAD

warnings: paternal absence

FLASHBACK

ivory had always known her life wasn’t exactly normal. but it wasn’t until she was six years old, sitting in her classroom with a crayon clutched in her tiny fingers, that she realized just how different it was.

the classroom was warm, sunlight spilling through the large windows, casting golden patches onto the wooden desks. outside, she could hear the distant shouts of kids playing during recess, the rhythmic thud of a basketball bouncing against pavement. the air smelled like glue and paper, the familiar scent of a classroom deep in an arts-and-crafts project.

at the front of the room, ms. kang clapped her hands together, a warm smile on her face. “alright, class! since parents’ day is coming up, we’re going to make special thank-you cards for our parents or guardians! you can draw your family and write a nice message to show them how much you love and appreciate them.”

excited chatter filled the room instantly. ivory watched as the other kids reached for their supplies—picking out their favorite colors, chattering about what their parents liked.

“my dad likes fishing!” one boy announced proudly, holding up a blue crayon. “my mom loves cooking! she always makes yummy food.” a girl said beside him, already scribbling on the card stock.

jane picked up a pink crayon, twirling it between her fingers. she knew what to draw—her and her mom. her small hands moved carefully, outlining a simple figure with dark hair and big eyes—her mom, of course. then, next to her, a smaller version of herself, holding her mother’s hand.

she was focused, tongue poking slightly out of the corner of her mouth, when a voice beside her made her pause.

“where’s your dad?”

ivory blinked, glancing up at the boy sitting next to her. minho. he was peering at her drawing, his own half-finished card lying on the table. a scribbly drawing of a man and a woman stood on his page, a big heart between them.

she looked back at her drawing.

where was her dad?

she suddenly felt self-conscious, staring at the blank space next to her mother. the realization hit her like a quiet wave—everyone else was drawing two parents. two figures holding hands. two sets of arms wrapping around them.

but she only had one.

the pink crayon in her hand felt heavier now. “i don’t have one,” she mumbled, unsure of why the words felt strange on her tongue.

minho frowned. “huh? what do you mean? everybody has a dad.” jane’s tiny fingers tightened around the crayon defensively. “well, i don’t,” she said, a little more firmly this time.

the dark haired boy gave her a puzzled look, like she had just told him she didn’t have a belly button. or that she was an alien. or that she had four arms instead of two.

“that’s weird,” he muttered before going back to his drawing.

ivory sat frozen. her heart thudded loudly in her chest, a strange, uncomfortable feeling creeping in. she had never really thought about it before. she had her mom. that had always been enough.

but now, for the first time, she felt like she was missing something.

jieun could tell something was wrong the moment ivory climbed into the car.

the little girl was unusually quiet, her small hands folded in her lap, eyes staring at nothing in particular.

“you’re quiet today, sweetheart,” jieun said gently, glancing at her through the rearview mirror. “did something happen at school?”

ivory hesitated, her grip tightening on the paper in her hands.

after a long moment, she finally asked, “grandma, why don’t i have a dad?”

the question was soft, hesitant, but it sliced through the air like a blade. jieun’s fingers tightened around the steering wheel. she had been expecting this question for years, but somehow, she still wasn’t prepared.

“what made you ask that, love?” she asked, keeping her voice steady.

the young girl looked down at the card in her hands, tracing the edges of the paper with her fingers. “we were making cards for parents’ day and minho said everybody has a dad.”

jieun inhaled sharply, glancing at the little girl’s reflection in the mirror. “oh, baby,” she murmured, her heart aching at the confusion on her granddaughter’s face. jane finally looked up and met her stare in the mirror’s reflection.

“so do i have one?”

jieun took a slow breath before answering carefully.

“yes,” she said gently. “but he’s not here.”

ivory frowned. that wasn’t fair. if she had a dad, why wasn’t he around? why didn’t he wear ties or pick her up from school like her friends’ dads? “where is he?” she couldn’t comprehend that perhaps her father was a man who actively made the decision to not be in her life. surely her dad must be more busy than her mom. or maybe he was some secret agent, or a spy? that would explain why he wasn’t around for her or jennie.

jieun’s grip on the steering wheel tightened until her knuckles turned white. she could feel ivory’s expectant gaze in the mirror, those big, searching eyes that reminded her so much of jennie when she was young—curious, determined, relentless.

how was she supposed to answer this? how could she explain something so heavy, so painful, to a child who still believed the world was fair?

there were so many things jieun could say. so many ways she could frame it. but in the end, she settled for the truth—at least, as much of it as her granddaughter needed to hear.

“that’s something for your mom to tell you,” she said, her voice soft. “but what i can tell you is this—your mother loves you more than anything in the world. more than anything.”

once they got home, ivory was quieter than usual. she didn’t run inside like she normally would, kicking off her shoes and shouting about her day. instead, she trailed behind jieun, clutching the card she had made in school, her tiny fingers wrinkling the edges.

jieun watched her carefully, noting the way her little shoulders were tense, the way her brows furrowed in deep thought. it broke her heart, but there was nothing she could do—this was something jennie had to handle.

“ivory, sweetheart,” jieun called gently as she set her purse down on the kitchen counter. “why don’t you go wash up before dinner?”

ivory hesitated but eventually nodded, dragging her feet as she shuffled toward the bathroom.

jieun exhaled, her gaze drifting toward the clock. jennie would be home very soon. she should give her a warning—prepare her for the conversation she was about to have.

and sure enough, just as jieun was finishing up setting the table, the front door clicked open. the idol stepped inside, looking exhausted from her long day, her coat hanging off one shoulder, her hair tied back in a loose ponytail. she barely had time to kick off her heels before jieun greeted her with a knowing look.

jennie knew something was up. jane always came running the moment that door opened. she could feel the tension in the air, and she braced herself for whatever was coming next. her heart started to pound, sensing something she couldn’t quite place. she’d been so focused on her work, her schedule, and the whirlwind of the past few weeks, but in that moment, everything felt off. her maternal instincts were on overdrive, her fine tuned senses picking up on the usual lightness of home being significantly heavier. jennie dropped her bag by the door, peeling off her coat and hanging it up with mechanical precision, her thoughts already racing ahead to what might be waiting for her.

jieun’s gaze lingered on her, and for a split second, jennie could feel the weight of something unspoken. it was in the way her mother was holding herself, the subtle way her fingers fidgeted with the edge of a napkin, a tiny indication that something was wrong.

“hey, where is she?” jennie asked, her voice casual but carrying a note of concern. she usually didn’t go a minute without seeing her daughter, especially when she was home. the house felt unusually quiet without her baby girl’s bright energy.

jieun sighed, her shoulders relaxing a bit as she finally spoke. she knew jennie could feel something was off. after all, jieun was a mother herself. she knew that maternal intuition was a lifeline. “she’s in her room.” she replied gently. jennie nodded, instinctively heading toward the hallway. but before she could take a step, jieun called out softly, “but there’s something you need to know.”

the words hung in the air like a delicate thread, fragile and heavy. the mentioned woman turned back to look at her, confusion on her knitted brows. “what’s wrong? is everything okay?”

“she asked about her father.”

jennie froze. and suddenly she was transported back in time to when she was her daughter’s age, asking about the absence of her own father. the weight of the words fell over jennie like a heavy blanket, the breath caught in her chest. she couldn’t speak for a moment, her mind frozen, replaying the question she herself had asked so many years ago. she had been just a girl, no older than ivory, when she asked her mother the same thing.

where’s my dad?

jennie had never truly gotten an answer, just vague explanations that never quite felt like the truth. her father had left when she was still young, his absence an unwelcome shadow over her childhood. even now, that innocent question lingered like a scar, untouched and unhealed.

“jennie?” the voice of her own mother in front of her broke through her thoughts. “what’s wrong? is everything okay?”

the idol swallowed hard, but her throat felt tight, as if the words wouldn’t come. it took a long moment before she found her voice again, weak but steady. jennie’s gaze drifted toward the floor, her hands wringing nervously in front of her.

“she deserves answers. and i don’t know how to give them to her.”

the room felt smaller all of a sudden, like the walls were closing in. she could feel the weight of it all—the guilt, the fear, the lingering shame of never having provided ivory with the answers she so desperately wanted.

jennie had promised herself, when she was pregnant, that she would never put her daughter through the same pain she had experienced growing up without a father. yet, here they were. her baby girl, just as confused as she had once been, asked the question she had always dreaded: why don’t i have a dad?

jennie had never told ivory the truth about her father—who he was, why he wasn’t around, or how he had made the choice to leave. in the beginning, it was easier to tell herself that jane didn’t need to know, that she would be enough. but as her daughter grew older, the cracks in that facade began to show.

now, with that question hanging in the air between them, jennie didn’t know how to fix it.

she felt the tears welling up in her eyes, but she blinked them away, trying to hold it together. she couldn’t break down now. not when ivory needed her the most.

the other woman in the room, watching her carefully, took a step closer. “it’s not your fault, jennie,” she said softly, almost as if reading her mind. “you can’t control everything, especially not him.”

“i know. but it doesn’t make it any easier.” she exhaled shakily, her thoughts spiraling. “she doesn’t deserve to feel abandoned. i promised myself she wouldn’t grow up like i did—feeling like something was missing. but i’ve failed her.”

“no, you haven’t.” the woman’s voice was firm, insistent. “you’ve done everything you can to protect her, to give her the life you didn’t have. you’re doing the best you can, my dear. don’t let that guilt take away from everything you’ve given her already.”

jennie looked up, meeting the woman’s eyes, and for the first time in what felt like forever, she allowed herself to take a breath. it wasn’t all her fault. she couldn’t change the past, but she could shape the future for ivory. she could still be the mother ivory needed.

but the truth about her father... that was something jennie wasn’t sure she was ready to face. let alone tell her daughter.

the silence hung heavily in the room, and jennie couldn’t escape the crushing weight of the question that lingered in her life for a second time now.

she could feel the distance between her and ivory growing, a gap that no amount of love could fill. how was she supposed to bridge that gap when the one thing her daughter needed most—answers—was the one thing jennie could not give?

her body moved automatically to her daughter’s bedroom. her feet carried her down the familiar hallway, each step heavier than the last. she passed by the framed pictures on the walls—moments frozen in time, snapshots of happier times. her hand rested briefly on the doorframe of ivory’s room before she slowly pushed the door open.

ivory’s room was as it had always been—warm toned, cozy, with little pieces of her personality scattered throughout. the stuffed animals, the beanbag in the corner, the little gifts jennie had gotten her from her travels overseas. but tonight, it all seemed so distant, so out of place. jennie’s gaze settled on the bed, the unmade sheets, and the quiet stillness that filled the room. it was as though the walls were waiting for something that wasn’t coming.

she stepped inside, closing the door softly behind her, and took a deep breath. the scent of her daughter’s perfume still lingered in the air—familiar, comforting, yet so painfully absent. she sat on the edge of the bed, her fingers lightly brushing against the soft fabric of the blanket. the weight of the silence in this room was deafening. it was like her life had been paused, suspended in time, and the only thing she could think about was the absence of the one person who had meant everything to her.

jennie’s mind flashed back to the past, to those late nights when she would sneak into ivory’s room just to watch her sleep, to feel the warmth of her daughter’s presence. she’d done everything in her power to protect ivory, to give her a life filled with love and opportunity. but now, it felt like everything was unraveling at once. and the worst part?

she didn’t know how to fix it.

ivory’s bathroom was joined to her bedroom, and she saw the back of her daughter’s head as she finished washing her hands. turning around, jane’s eyes lit up slightly at the sight of her mother on her bed.

jennie’s heart ached as she watched her daughter move about the room, the quiet swish of jane’s hands as she dried them on the towel, the soft thud of her footsteps as she stepped toward the bed. it was the kind of simple moment that felt monumental—like a scene frozen in time, the unspoken distance between them widening with every second that passed. she longed for the carefree days, when her daughter would run to her after a long day, when laughter filled the house, when nothing seemed impossible to mend.

but those days felt so far away now, slipping through her fingers like sand.

ivory stopped in front of the bed, her eyes still lighting up slightly, but it was a hesitant glow—a flicker of something that was there and then gone, as if even her daughter could sense the weight of the silence hanging between them.

"did grandma tell you?" ivory began, her voice unsure, quiet. as if she was trying to pull something from jennie, some kind of confirmation she was desperately searching for. her fingers fidgeted with the hem of her sleeve, a small, nervous habit she’d developed over the years.

jennie could feel the hesitation in the air. she could see the faint lines of worry across her child’s face, the tension in her shoulders. the question was hanging there, but it wasn’t just about what grandma had said—it was about something deeper.

something that neither of them wanted to address, but had to.

jennie cleared her throat, trying to steady herself, her fingers curling tighter into the fabric of the sheets beneath her. “yes.” her voice was soft, coaxing, though it carried the underlying tremor of her own fears.

silently, jane pointed to the card face down on her nightstand, the one she had made at school. curious, her mother picked it up and flipped it over.

jennie felt the cool edge of the card as she picked it up, her heart heavy in her chest. the card was face down, like her daughter didn’t want to give anything away just yet. the idol’s hands were gentle as she flipped it over, her eyes scanning the simple design.

there were no elaborate drawings, no over-the-top doodles that usually came with children’s creations. instead, there was a single message on the front, written carefully in six year old ivory’s handwriting.

for mom.

a lump formed in jennie’s throat as she traced the words with her fingers. the card wasn’t a father’s day card, and it wasn’t a “thank you” card. it was simply for her—just for jennie.

not jennie kim, the idol. just jennie kim, the mother.

she could feel the weight of the unspoken words in the simplicity of the gesture. ivory hadn’t needed to say anything for jennie to understand. she had already said everything through this small act of defiance.

her eyes blurred slightly, emotion threatening to spill over. jane had already been through so much in her life, things a child shouldn’t have to carry. the absence of a father, the pressure of being constantly in the shadows of her mother’s career, and yet, here ivory was, still giving everything of herself. not asking for anything but her presence, her love.

the woman swallowed hard, taking a moment to compose herself. the tightness in her chest was unbearable, but it wasn’t just sadness—it was pride. pride in the person her child was becoming, even when things around them weren’t ideal. she reached down to slide her hand under the card, feeling the weight of it as though it were the most precious thing in the world.

ivory watched her mother’s expression closely, her own face unreadable. the silence between them was thick, heavy, but there was something unspoken in it that made everything clearer. the words they couldn’t bring themselves to say floated between them, settling in the air like the softest promise.

“come here, valentine.” jennie whispered as she held her arms open.

ivory hesitated for only a moment before she climbed into her mother’s embrace. her small body nestled against jennie’s chest, the familiar scent of her mother's perfume grounding her in a way nothing else could. the card, the unspoken words, the weight of the world they both carried—it all seemed to melt away in the quiet of this simple moment.

jennie wrapped her arms around her young child tightly, pulling her close as though she could protect her from everything—the pain, the loneliness, the uncertainty that loomed so heavily over both of them. she rested her cheek against ivory’s downy hair, feeling the soft warmth and for a moment, she didn’t need to say anything.

“mom,” ivory’s voice was barely a whisper, the words soft but loaded with so much weight, so much vulnerability, that they seemed to linger in the air, suspended between them. jennie froze for a moment, the sound of her daughter’s voice cutting through the quiet of the room like a tender ache. she slowly turned her head, her breath catching in her chest. “yeah, baby?” her voice was thick with emotion, thick enough that it was hard to speak, hard to hold back the flood of feelings rising up in her throat. she reached down, her hand trembling slightly, and began to stroke ivory’s back in slow, soothing motions, as if her touch could somehow convey everything her heart felt.

“i love you.” the words were soft but simple, filled with a rawness that made jennie’s heart lurch. ivory’s words weren’t just a declaration; they were a plea, a balm, a promise all wrapped into one. they held the weight of everything that had been left unsaid, every silent worry and longing that had built up over the years.

jennie’s chest tightened, her eyes brimming with unshed tears. she felt the gravity of those words deep in her bones, and a rush of warmth flooded through her, radiating out from her daughter’s words. she wasn’t sure when it happened, when it became clear, but in that moment, all the world seemed to pause, and all that mattered was the love that passed between them, unspoken yet undeniable.

“i love you too,” jennie whispered, her voice shaky as she pressed her lips to the crown of her child’s head, as though sealing that promise with a kiss. her hand still rested gently on her daughter’s back, fingers splayed across the softness of her shirt, holding her as close as she possibly could. there was nothing else she needed to say, no more explanations or apologies.

ivory didn’t need anything else. she didn’t need a dad—she had her mom. and that was enough.

jennie felt her heart swell with emotion, the tightness in her chest both painful and comforting. she had been a single mother for so long, carrying the weight of both roles, trying to be enough for her child despite the challenges that came with it.

and now, in this simple moment, she realized that she had succeeded.

for the first time in a long time, jennie felt at peace with the life they had built together, the one that had been their own, separate from the chaos of the world around them. she could face whatever came next, because in the end, she had her daughter.

and that was more than enough.

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#jennie kim #blackpink #lesserafim #angst #kpop angst #original series #jisoo kim #roseanne park #lalisa manoban #kim chaewon #ivory #perfectsunlight

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